Ash rants about his HOI experience with jack
19 views4/6/2026
Ash rants about his experience playing HOI with Jack. The German military genius.
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| 00:00 - 00:03 | Since joining the war with jack |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | He has dragged us into a war with most of europe, including Finland. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Our units are in a stalemate in the northern part of Finland |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | The 24 divisions arrived and are plugging the gaps in belgium |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | And the next 24 divisions are rushing to stop Switzerlands advance into Berlin |
| 00:17 - 00:21 | In Finland the counter attack out of Leningrad is obviously pushing the Fins back decisively right? |
| 00:24 - 00:27 | Uhm. The counter attack. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | ... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Well it... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The attack is a complete catastrophy. The troops left a gap on their left side. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | They are encircled and are unable to breakout, Fins are pouring into Russia. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone who is not currently one of my generals leading my armies. Leave now. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU ENCIRCLED IN A 2 TILE CHOKE POINT |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | AND OF COURSE I HAVE NO ARMIES AVAILABLE TO STOP THEIR ADVANCE - BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL IN BERLIN! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Why does this keep happening to me. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | I send my best men to fight in Jacks wars! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | The useless fucking baboon that he is! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | He can't just be patient and plan ahead before he jumps into war. |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | And then begs for me to send my men to fight his wars |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | We can send our southern troops to fight to take back Moscow |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | The southern army is 500km from Moscow! The Fins are skiing their way through Russia! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | We're making progress in northern Finland |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Making fucking progress in Finland... |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Theres nothing there! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | We should be invading Poland. Latvia, Estonia, Iran. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Following the fucking plan we spent the last hour drawing up. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Not fighting for fucking Berlin against the Swiss and Flemish! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Fighting a losing battle for some dumb ass sitting there filming Finland take our capital |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | The same dumbass who failed to take Austria and Slovakia as Germany! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Same shit every fucking game |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Rushing into an unwinnable war against the whole fucking world. And dragging me in unprepared. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I spend hours drawing up plans. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Plans with winnable battles. Like when i played as the French. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | And he ruined it yet again. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | For what. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | FOR SOME FUCKING MELON TO GET HIS WHOLE COUNTRY MAP TO TURN RED. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | AND THEN TO TURN THE SPEED TO X5 WHEN IM REDRAWING MY BATTLE LINES. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | But its fine when he needs to pause. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | He'll happily pause when he needs to plan his next genius move. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | To start beefing with anyone else that he can! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | its okay though. next playthrough we'll try and make it to 1938 |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I thought it was bad enough losing to Polish Peasants. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Or getting dragged into the Italian Civil war... |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | And then losing to Romania. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Or 6 months to a French coup.. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | This is the last time i send that dickhead any of my troops. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | He's losing with the best military in the world. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | He cannot be saved. |