| 00:00 - 00:03 | Word from our man on the ground, Sir |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We have it on good authority |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | At 1400 hours this afternoon |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Marks & Spencer in Spytty was wiped of all reduced items in a single transaction |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | There is only one possible individual operating within 2 miles of the complex |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Next to the Big Tesco ... |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | By Shit hole Ringland ? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | There's More ... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We believe Grandma has re-surfaced |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | I have alerted the authorities |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All those brave enough to speak her name .... Remain |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | GRANDMA ?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | YOU ASSURED ME SHE WAS UNDER CONTROL ! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | That woman can clear out a retail park of bargains in a 15 minute window ! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Its not just Marks & Spencer's either ... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | NO WHERE IS SAFE ! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | ASDA LIVING...POUNDLAND...HOME BARGAINS... |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | THERE'S BEEN RUMOURS OF A NEW WET ROOM |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | NO WONDER SHE'S BACK ON THE PROWL ! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, WE had no idea she would go ahead with it |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | WHY WEREN'T YOU WATCHING THE HOUSE ? ? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Sir , we had Spy's |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Jane & Tony are useless wet wipes , you know that !! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | A NEW BATHROOM ! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | She's been threatening it for years .... |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | No one ever thought it would happen !! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | And now she's back bargain hunting to feed her addiction ! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Towels .. bath mats.. shower curtains ... |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Shitty little accessories from Home bargains to clutter the house even more !! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | The woman will not stop until the little bedroom is filled |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | God knows what the bloody attic looks like !! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Has anyone checked on Lyndon ? |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I feel for him, deep in my heart |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | No wonder he went grey so young.. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Bloody Grandma .. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | THE WOMAN DOESN'T SLEEP ! SHE IS ON AMAZON EVERY NIGHT !! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | EACH DAY SHE WILL BUY MORE SHIT TO FEED HER ADDICTION |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | She only stops for a coffee or a wee |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | and sometime she even requests lunch out !! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I heard they went to Toby Carvery the other day !!! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | I went there once....they ran out of gravy |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Send word to Lyndon |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Assure him we will not rest until she is contained .. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Not to mention .. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | The christmas bargains are now out |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Lure her in with reduced clothing & toilet rolls |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | She will not be able to resist ... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | God help us |
