| 00:00 - 00:03 | All patrol stations are critically manned |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | 200 deputies have lateraled |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | and we cant staff a station shitter |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Surrounding agencies are raping us blind |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Palm Desert is doing bullshit morale raffles that no one joins... |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Morale will improve when Huizinga wins the election |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | and Bianco drops out of the race |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Sheriff.. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Huizinga... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Huizinga lost the election and was kicked out of RSA |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Bill Young is the RSA President and Bianco is gaining momentum |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who plans on voting for Bianco please leave the room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | How did that weasel lose that election? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I hand picked that fucktard to win |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | And Bianco! Was two years in the cellar not enough? He decides to run again! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I'm paying my wild women too much and now the media has noticed |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | That asshole Freeman is even calling one eggplant |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | How can I keep blaming my budget issues on the county |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | when people find out I'm paying someone $89,000 |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | to monitor fucking Twitter and Facebook? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | But Sheriff, Eggplant is a Senior Public Information Specialist! |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Bullshit! Everyone knows she is a damn spy! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Sheriff, we need her to help cover up the promotion scandal |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | The cheating scandal you created by lying to the press! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I could only give them 16 hours |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | because you told the media it didnt occur! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Yet everyone in the damn department knows it happened! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | and I promoted a few of the cheating pricks! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | My best cops and Investigators |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | are jumping ship and leaving. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | I'm like a hooker on the Titanic |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | It's only a matter of time until I go down. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Ten years as a dictator and I'm going to |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | lose to Chad Bianco...a mere Lieutenant |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | I wanted him confined to Hemet Station |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I took away his uniform and car |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | and ordered him confined to the station. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | But Purvis fucked that up |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | and Bianco responded to a murder! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Now the Press Enterprise wrote an article |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | and people are blowing me up on social media. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry Eggplant, a couple of us still like you. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe I can save my ass |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | and issue some more CCW's. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I heard my Chiefs are |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | now kissing Bianco's ass... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | On the bright side, if I lose |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I have more time to dress up like a |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | cowboy and throw cow shit. |
