| 00:00 - 00:03 | We've entered the BritPod Awards |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | After Phillippe Sand, it's no contest. Next stop, BBC4 |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | David Starkey's royally fucked himself |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They'll bin all that Tudor shite |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | We'll have a series on the QF 17-pdr, no codpieces |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | And the Operational Level |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | A shit ton about the Operational Level |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mr Holland |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | We regret to inform you |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We...regretfully inform you... |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | We... Did not win the award. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | We....Didn't win.... |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I drove around in a tank for those ball-bags. |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | A big, skanky fucking Russian tank |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | I was polite about Al Murray's tramp beard |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I spent half a fucking episode talking about The Cult... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | And those shit-eating bastards did not even... |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Make us a runner-up in the Pop Culture category. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Keith Park, Frank Messervy, Ian Astbury |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | I rescue these men from the dustbin of history.... |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mr Holland, Ian Astbury isn't really a military figure... |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | You think, sugar tits? You'd prefer Arthur Percival? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Mr Holland, Percival was a bad General, and a worse Rock frontman, but... |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | You'll still want me to do a Podcast about that bell-end, won't you? |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I should get a prize just for that! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Singapore is one degree away from the shitting equator |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | I can't talk about the 'brutal winters'. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | No 'man for man' quotes about the Japanese |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | I can only say 'Tactical Chutzpah' twice max |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | The degenerates who listen to this show will die of thirst... |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Playing 'We Have Ways of Making You Drink'! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Can you even say 'Achtung, Achtung' in Malay? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | And Al tried so hard, building his little tanks |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | The man's an artist. He made proper dioramas |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | He even painted the little bloke in the turret's face properly. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | His Saddam Hussein impression was superb. SUPERB! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | He even used the word 'profligate' on the show |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Without looking pretentious. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | And those swine, those filthy fucking swine |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Still can't give our show a prize in the 'Family Podcast' category |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Just because of all the industrialized warfare! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, the 30% book discount is still valid |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | It's hopeless. We still have to face those headcases, those thousands of headcases |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Who think the 88mm and the MG42 are the absolute tits. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | The Panzer-fanciers |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Those crayon eaters who don't get why Sten guns had to be cheap |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Those fart-sniffers, who go on and on about welding techniques in Type VII U-boat construction |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | 'They could go so deep!' Doesn't matter that we sunk them all |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Even Ian Astbury dresses up as a Fallschirmjäger on weekends |
