00:00 - 00:03As well know, the Third Reich favours the campaign of Ted Cruz. Our goal is to get him elected.
00:04 - 00:05Unfortunately because of the immigration laws, ironically crafted by the people we support, we need to immigrate legally to get him elected.
00:05 - 00:07So, our goal is to sabotage America, by immigrating under new aliases, and to reside in Texas for the duration of the election.
00:08 - 00:12Our only political opposition in doing this would be Bernie Sanders, who is a Jew, so...we have nothing to worry about...
00:12 - 00:15Because no one likes to elect a Jew, they'll just take all of the money.
00:17 - 00:19Obviously there must be another Republican opposing Cruz...
00:19 - 00:21I know how America's shit political system works, two guys have to fight it out for the primary.
00:24 - 00:26Mein Führer...
00:27 - 00:28Steiner...
00:31 - 00:33Steiner says the only other opposition is Donald Trump.
00:34 - 00:36It appears he has used his toupee to wipe the asses of the GOP.
00:53 - 00:58Anybody who has seen me cry before...stay here, everyone else...get the fuck out.
01:13 - 01:15That's fucking insane!
01:15 - 01:17That fucking toupee-wearing asshat is insane!
01:18 - 01:23Never in my life have I seen a man who more closely resembles a fucking orangutan!
01:25 - 01:28I swear to God he got a tan in the same booth Snookie uses - the skank!
01:29 - 01:31He has a faker looking toupee than Shatner does!
01:31 - 01:34And I can guarantee it's been in a few of his wives vaginas before, I promise there's sand and dirt in that shit!
01:34 - 01:37There's something not right about America's political system!
01:37 - 01:40Either you have to elect a Jew or you have to elect a fucking ape!
01:40 - 01:42Mein Führer, I can see why you are angry but goddamn! He preserves our interest-
01:42 - 01:46Obviously you can't see! That's how far your head is shoved up his ass!
01:46 - 01:48Mein Führer, I hate him, too. There is no one better than Cruz, but they're both Republicans!
01:48 - 01:52Don't compare Cruz to that fat fucking fish!
01:53 - 01:54Spongebob!
01:56 - 01:57That's the word that comes to mind, he looks like a character out of Spongebob!
01:57 - 02:00He looks like something Discovery Channel would put on the air during its decline!
02:00 - 02:03Your nose has been so far up his ass I can smell the shit coming out of your nostrils when you exhale!
02:04 - 02:08Obviously he's a fucking "Planet of Apes" cast member!
02:08 - 02:13And don't even get me started on his fucking teeth!
02:14 - 02:16I swear to God he wears dentures dirtier than Davey Jone's asshole!
02:17 - 02:21The U.S might as well give the monkey asshole to Stalin!
02:27 - 02:29After all, he DID want to make some ape soldiers...
02:30 - 02:34I hope they have space for a lard ass.
02:34 - 02:36Because Cruz is our guy, no one else!
02:41 - 02:42Far right assholes...I hate them all!
02:43 - 02:47I spent trillions of dollars corrupting my own life in my own country!
02:48 - 02:53And now these assholes wanna take away my right to do it in other countries!?
02:54 - 02:56Don't even get me started on Bernie Sanders, that pharmacy-owning Jew!
02:56 - 02:59I swear he's had seventeen fucking Bar Mitzvas!
03:00 - 03:02He's so old I asked him to act his own age and he died!
03:04 - 03:07It's okay, he doesn't know you blew him.
03:14 - 03:16Gentlemen, our fight is lost.
03:19 - 03:23...We didn't even get a chance to be Americans.
03:25 - 03:26It's lost.
03:31 - 03:33Gone...with the wind.
03:40 - 03:46You didn't even get my reference, did you? Of course you didn't. It went over your head like everything else.
03:46 - 03:49But then you ask why I clog your toilet every morning.
03:53 - 03:56Worse than Jurassic Park Three.