00:00 - 00:03 | Herr Director Preuninger, we have found out that some |
00:04 - 00:05 | Florida rednecks stuffed a manual tranny into a GT3RS |
00:05 - 00:07 | and they did it with all Porsche original parts ordered from dealerships. |
00:08 - 00:12 | The conversion is complete and it looks like it came out of our factory. |
00:12 - 00:15 | They got their hands on a new 911R transmission from Porsche parts dept. |
00:17 - 00:19 | Lock down all further tranny orders from parts. |
00:19 - 00:21 | No more R transmissions are to leave if not in a car. |
00:24 - 00:26 | Mr. Preuninger, |
00:27 - 00:28 | Steiner, you take this. |
00:31 - 00:33 | I must inform you that the parts department |
00:34 - 00:36 | has already shipped three more such transmissions, all paid for. |
00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who has never driven a 911 with a manual tranny, get out. |
01:13 - 01:15 | This is exactly what I was afraid of! |
01:15 - 01:17 | We can't have CUSTOMERS building their dream 911s before we do! |
01:18 - 01:23 | Do you have any idea what this does to Porsche Exclusivity? |
01:25 - 01:28 | What next? They'll install supersized CUP HOLDERS! |
01:29 - 01:31 | Big enough for their 64 ounce slushies! |
01:31 - 01:34 | and then they'll be wanting their carpets replaced under warranty |
01:34 - 01:37 | after they spill the whole damned thing during an autocross event! |
01:37 - 01:40 | Never mind that they should not drink in the car anyway! |
01:40 - 01:42 | We know that Americans can't get into a car without a big gulp! |
01:42 - 01:46 | I know that! But the GT3RS is practically a RACE CAR, not a SNACK BAR! |
01:46 - 01:48 | Sir, shouldn't we get back to the GT3 conversion? |
01:48 - 01:52 | You're right, sorry for the diversion. I'm just really torqued right now. |
01:53 - 01:54 | Why didn't we make that car first? |
01:56 - 01:57 | It seems so reasonable, Porsche lovers love manual transmissions. |
01:57 - 02:00 | But some marketing weenie looked into his computer and decided |
02:00 - 02:03 | that there wasn't enough demand for it. |
02:04 - 02:08 | If Butzi Porsche were alive right now he'd have the whole GT department |
02:08 - 02:13 | INCLUDING ME, lined up against the wall and SHOT. |
02:14 - 02:16 | And I wasn't even told! The PR hacks have had me signing fucking GT3 |
02:17 - 02:21 | hoods and souvenir books for most of the last three years instead of working! |
02:27 - 02:30 | I guess we have to spin this to make it look good. Send out the PR guys |
02:30 - 02:34 | to see the car, interview the owner and techs, and give the impression that |
02:34 - 02:36 | that we fully approved of the project and bent over backwards to help them. |
02:41 - 02:42 | This is insane. Now customers are telling US what THEY want? |
02:43 - 02:47 | Who the fuck do they think they are? |
02:48 - 02:53 | WE ARE PORSCHE. We build it, THEY BUY IT, that's how it works. |
02:54 - 02:56 | We're the smallest part of VW but we make most of the profit |
02:56 - 02:59 | and we do it by making our most desirable cars in SMALL numbers. |
03:00 - 03:02 | The last thing we need is people MAKING the 911 that we don't want made! |
03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, I promise I'll keep your project a secret. |
03:14 - 03:16 | I dread going to work tomorrow morning. |
03:19 - 03:23 | Every damned one of our factory drivers is going to want us |
03:25 - 03:26 | to do the same thing, stick a manual in a GT3RS. |
03:31 - 03:33 | You can't imagine.... |
03:40 - 03:46 | Kissing their asses is the worst part of my job. |
03:46 - 03:49 | They get sweaty in those racing suits, you know. |
03:53 - 03:56 | And I still have GT3 hoods to sign tomorrow. |