Squeeze & Lather III Plans Revealed

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35 views4/9/2026
Byrty reveals his plans for the third instalment of the Squeeze & Lather Golf Tournament

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00:00 - 00:03I've booked this year's Squeeze & Lather in Tocumwal
00:04 - 00:05Included in my package, you will see
00:05 - 00:07our accommodation is here
00:08 - 00:12which is nice and close to the local tourist attractions
00:12 - 00:15although is not actually located on course here.
00:17 - 00:19You mean, we are not staying on course?
00:19 - 00:21And we'll need to get taxi's to the club?
00:24 - 00:26Leigh...
00:27 - 00:28There's ahh..
00:31 - 00:33There's one more thing Leigh..
00:34 - 00:36Byrty hasn't booked an isolated snorer's room
00:53 - 00:58Byrty, Manfield, Stefan, stay here. Everyone else, leave the room.
01:13 - 01:15That's why I should have organised it myself!
01:15 - 01:17Why the FUCK didn't I just sort it all out myself?!
01:18 - 01:23I let that spastic Mansfield do it the first year
01:25 - 01:28and by some miracle he actually did an okay job
01:29 - 01:31So I let him do it again.
01:31 - 01:34But for some unknown fucking reason
01:34 - 01:37he hands it over to this novice cock jockey
01:37 - 01:40who has no FUCKING idea what he's doing!
01:40 - 01:42But Leigh, he organises things in his day job.
01:42 - 01:46He can stick his day job up his fucking arse Stefan!
01:46 - 01:48But Leigh, he has the right skill set -
01:48 - 01:52Right skill set? This is a Squeeze and fucking LATHER Stefan!
01:53 - 01:54This can't be fucked up!
01:56 - 01:57Staying off course..
01:57 - 02:00Couped up like like chickens in a hutch
02:00 - 02:03Byrty snoring the fucking coup to smithereens!
02:04 - 02:08I had to room with you last year Byrty and I still haven't recovered.
02:08 - 02:13All I needed was a decent sleep before attacking Day 2, but NO!
02:14 - 02:16Instead i had to drag my mattress to the lounge room
02:17 - 02:21and when I got there i could still hear you snoring!
02:27 - 02:29No wonder I imploded and didn't give a yelp...
02:30 - 02:34Years of threatening.. in Golden Shafts with respect!
02:34 - 02:36I invented Squeeze & Lather so I could actually win something
02:41 - 02:42We had a good thing going in Yarrawonga
02:43 - 02:47Why the FUCK did you have to flip the script and take us to Tocumwal?!
02:48 - 02:53The whole point of the Squeeze is to stay put in one place
02:54 - 02:56but you book us in a motel across the fucking road?!
02:56 - 02:59Who's going to drive us home when we've had 15 fucking jars?!
03:00 - 03:02This is how you go about organising your first trip Byrt?!
03:04 - 03:07Don't worry.. Miller will let Byrty organise a Shaft one day.
03:14 - 03:16And I thought we had a good thing going
03:19 - 03:23Just the Victorian chapter of the Shaft
03:25 - 03:26Mansfield?
03:31 - 03:33You have been reassigned for next year.
03:40 - 03:46And Byrty, if you are ever assigned to organise an event ever again
03:46 - 03:49for a future Squeeze, or heaven fucking forbid, a Shaft..
03:53 - 03:56be better.