| 00:00 - 00:03 | Sir, 120 miles of pipe are on site |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | we can confidently lay it |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | over the whole course |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | every green every tee |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and all for 800k |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | excellent so that's the |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | drainage sorted at last |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | erm it's irrigation pipes |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | not drainage |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | we got a deal on taps too |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | could greens committee please remain |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | the rest please leave the room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | what the fuck are clowns you smoking |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | irrigation irri fucking gation |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | look out the window |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Do you see the Gobi Desert ? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Tribes of Bedouins ? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | its September and we're under water again |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | irrigation my arse , |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | We've got ducks on every fairway |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Wallasey and Caldy have irrigation |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Comparing us to Wallasey |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | sir we're a premier course |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Moron, we're as close to Wallasey |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | As Sanderson is to Brad Pitt |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | look up God has sorted irrigationion |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | its called rain |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | its free , doesn't need pipes |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | and we don't get fleeced |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | for 800 k by some slippery bastard |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Lord give me strength |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Do you stars do cabaret ? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Didn't we learn from last year |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | The 5th was driver, fairway wood |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | and a fucking paddle board |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | and here we go again |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | How did this happen |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | which genius thought we needed more water |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | And you just know those arseholes |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | from Caldy are pissing themselves |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | about the Heswall suba diving and golf club |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't tell me you've sold your Lilo Frieda |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I'm sick of every other club |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | sending me Snorkels and flippers |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | some mother fekker |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | even left a canoe in my parking space |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Irri fucking gation |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | what's your next genius plan |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | harvesting moon cheese ? |
