| 00:00 - 00:03 | As you know, Haas had a very bad season last year. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | They came last with 12 points |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | and their car was a shitbox. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They deployed yet another backwards upgrade costing $8 million dollars |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and Gene Haas was rumoured to be demanding changes at Haas. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | This will be great drama for next year. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Get an interview with Steiner booked in. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Ah, sir... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | About that... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Haas has appointed Ayao Komatsu as its new Team Principal. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Gunther Steiner has been fired from Haas effective immediately. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | The following will remain: Horner, Wolff, the Russell fuckboy, and Will Buxton. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | THIS IS A FUCKING DISASTER! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | DRIVE TO SURVIVE IS COMPLETELY RUINED! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Steiner was the only fucking thing worth watching in the entire season! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Now what do we fucking show? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Verstappen winning every race? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Steiner alone made the fucking thing worthwhile! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | His foksmashing injected some goddamn life into the programme! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Nobody wants to watch dull as shit racing with Red Bull! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Hey, Max is a great driver to watch, a true natural-- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | HE WINS EVERY FUCKING RACE BY LAP 2! THE SEASON'S A FUCKING BOREFEST NOW! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | But what about the great rivalry between me and Toto? |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | That is fucking useless now that Toto has become a third place little BITCH! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | DAMN GENE HAAS! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | He blames Steiner for poor results, |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | but does he put any fucking money into his own fucking team? |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Haas are being outspent by Williams for fuck's sake! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Steiner's eccentric wit kept the fucking show going! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | How the hell am I supposed to translate JAPANESE POLITENESS into good quality entertainment??!?! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | I can just see series 7 now: |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Ten episodes of the same single caption for 45 minutes: just saying MAX VERSTAPPEN! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Steiner was going to provide us with gags for years. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | His memes alone would buy us millions of views. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | And keep F1 alive through the Red Bull years. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Fuck this shit! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Why the fuck would Haas give up their best asset? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | It's not like they have anything else going for them! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | I mean, look at their drivers! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | A useless Dane and a hasbeen German! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | And a car that eats tyres more than Otmar! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, we can always put Checo getting fired on next year. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | This is the end of Drive to Survive. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Nothing will ever replace Steiner in the line-up. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | It's over. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Cancel the series immediately. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | And send a email to Gene Haas with this message from me: |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | "Thanks for fucking us over, Gene!" |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | "See if you can bring Nikita Mazepin back for some lulz." |
