| 00:00 - 00:03 | The Benn Bill will gained Royal Assent today |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | After which you will be legally obliged to seek an extension |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to the Brexit deadline if a deal does not pass the commons by October 19th |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Our current polling figures are solid, but if we hold an election after the European Council meeting |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | our Brexit plan will be revealed to be nothing more than Theresa Mays deal in a scruffy blonde wig |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Nicky will find a loophole in the legislation so we |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | can say we acting fully within the law by refusing an extension. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Prime Minister! |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Corbyn's |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Corbyn's team failed to react to Chloe Westly's "Jeremy Fried Chicken" taunts |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | The opposition are now united in blocking an early election |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | all leave the room apart from Nicky, Gove, Crosby and Cummings |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Your "masterplans" have FAILED" |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | You expected the opposition to do absolutely nothing in response? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Just bring in the whole of the Vote Leave facebook ninjas you said.. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | (muffled crying) |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Sky Papers will have you back Chloe! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Briing in the "Boris for London" team they said - beat one socialist, one will be easier! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Richard Tice will only allow an election pact with Farage if we get a no-deal |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Michael Heinze and the donors say Crosby is turning this into 2017 |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Prime Minister we thought Hammond was only good at spreadsheets |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Genius Dom? Youre making Nick Timothy look like Machiavelli |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Prime Minister proroguing was always going to risky |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Even John Major managed a prorogue and he was just a grey jumped up bank clerk! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I don't want to hear it |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Cummings you said youd 'melt' the opposition when they find out what |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | youve planned in the coming weeks. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | PLEASE tell me it is not that second referendum garbage? |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | All you've "melted" so far is our majority chances of going to the country |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Galvanised the opposition against us and you failed to realise the possibily |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | the Lib Dems could hate a no-deal even more than Corbyn |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Corbyn's ineffective as Yeltsin? Compared to you lot he's more like Stalin |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Get me the Barclay Brothers on the line |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | We need to turn the Telegraph's propaganda up to 11. "Only Heracles Boris" |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | "Can Clean Up EUgean Filth" |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | TWO. more. So24s coming today |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Operation Yellowhammer? You spun that as incorrect because... it was out of date? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | By TWO Weeks? That was your rebuttal? So the newer version is all sunlight uplands? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | and emergency legislation to force me to obey the law? |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | just because I hinted that I "might" bend it? |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | you all said the truth was goingto be kicked into the long grass |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's OK, even a law to make the PM obey the law can be filibustered |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | And Dom - you'll have to go, not because I have a better replacement |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | You've been wearing that weird gilet for 2 weeks now |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I'm supposed to be the scruffy one |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | What's left for me - is to resign |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Let "Magic Grandpa" be PM and own this total Brexit debacle |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | before they realise that this Emperor has no clothes |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I'll go and see the Queen |
