| 00:00 - 00:03 | The review embargo for Hillbilly Elegy is up |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Netflix got the screeners out |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to international film writers |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Netflix is ready to campaign for the year |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Mank's reviews were lower than expected! |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I can start my campaign |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | and get my career best acclaim |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Glenn Close... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | The reviews... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The reviews are terrible |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | 39 Metacritic |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone who worked on the Oscars campaign for The Wife please leave |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I knew not to trust Ron Howard! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I was told I was working with an Oscar winner |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | But I am working with a fucking hack |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | That cannot even get me a locked win |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Netflix scammed me! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | They got Laura Dern an Oscar for doing nothing |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | But can't give the most overdue Actress shit |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | They put more effort into Tiger King's awards than me! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Glenn Close, you're still getting nominated |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | I didn't put that hideous wig on for only a nomination |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Glenn Close, you'll get a win some day |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | I cannot win |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Hollywood hates me! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | They call themselves voters |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | but all they do is vote for the worst actress |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | like that damn Jodie Foster |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Who cared about The Accused? |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Even Cher could get Best Actress! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | You suck at campaigning |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | You're probably all working for Olivia Colman! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I hate the Academy |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I invented acting as we know it |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Just so gay twitter can shittalk me |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Worthless... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | I paved the way for your basic fave actresses! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I delivered more iconic scenes in Dangerous Liasons |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Than Meryl Streep's entire career! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I will inflict a lethal plague |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | on the BAFTA Voters' blood! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, she did this before in 2019 |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I read the original book |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | It was shit, but I was told |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I'd get my Oscar |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I should've known... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Now that Mamma Mia girl is going to get an Oscar |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | I'll get ready for Sunset Boulevard |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | To flop again... |
