Boris in the Bunker
The strategy team feel the heat. Deep in Westminster. September 2019


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00:00 - 00:03The Benn Bill will gained Royal Assent today
00:04 - 00:05After which you will be legally obliged to seek an extension
00:05 - 00:07to the Brexit deadline if a deal does not pass the commons by October 19th
00:08 - 00:12Our current polling figures are solid, but if we hold an election after the European Council meeting
00:12 - 00:15our Brexit plan will be revealed to be nothing more than “Theresa May’s deal in a scruffy blonde wig”
00:17 - 00:19Nicky will find a loophole in the legislation so we
00:19 - 00:21can say we acting fully within the law by refusing an extension.
00:24 - 00:26Prime Minister!
00:27 - 00:28Corbyn's
00:31 - 00:33Corbyn's team failed to react to Chloe Westly's "Jeremy Fried Chicken" taunts
00:34 - 00:36The opposition are now united in blocking an early election
00:53 - 00:58all leave the room apart from Nicky, Gove, Crosby and Cummings
01:13 - 01:15Your "masterplans" have FAILED"
01:15 - 01:17You expected the opposition to do absolutely nothing in response?
01:18 - 01:23Just bring in the whole of the Vote Leave facebook ninjas you said..
01:25 - 01:28(muffled crying)
01:29 - 01:31Sky Papers will have you back Chloe!
01:31 - 01:34Briing in the "Boris for London" team they said - beat one socialist, one will be easier!
01:34 - 01:37Richard Tice will only allow an election pact with Farage if we get a no-deal
01:37 - 01:40Michael Heinze and the donors say Crosby is turning this into 2017
01:40 - 01:42Prime Minister we thought Hammond was only good at spreadsheets
01:42 - 01:46Genius Dom? You’re making Nick Timothy look like Machiavelli
01:46 - 01:48Prime Minister proroguing was always going to risky
01:48 - 01:52Even John Major managed a prorogue and he was just a grey jumped up bank clerk!
01:53 - 01:54I don't want to hear it
01:56 - 01:57Cummings you said you’d 'melt' the opposition when they find out what
01:57 - 02:00 you’ve planned in the coming weeks.
02:00 - 02:03PLEASE tell me it is not that second referendum garbage?
02:04 - 02:08All you've "melted" so far is our majority chances of going to the country
02:08 - 02:13Galvanised the opposition against us and you failed to realise the possibily
02:14 - 02:16the Lib Dems could hate a no-deal even more than Corbyn
02:17 - 02:21Corbyn's ineffective as Yeltsin? Compared to you lot he's more like Stalin
02:27 - 02:29Get me the Barclay Brothers on the line
02:30 - 02:34We need to turn the Telegraph's propaganda up to 11. "Only Heracles Boris"
02:34 - 02:36"Can Clean Up EUgean Filth"
02:41 - 02:42TWO. more. So24s coming today
02:43 - 02:47Operation Yellowhammer? You spun that as incorrect because... it was out of date?
02:48 - 02:53By TWO Weeks? That was your rebuttal? So the newer version is all sunlight uplands?
02:54 - 02:56and emergency legislation to force me to obey the law?
02:56 - 02:59just because I hinted that I "might" bend it?
03:00 - 03:02you all said the truth was goingto be kicked into the long grass
03:04 - 03:07It's OK, even a law to make the PM obey the law can be filibustered
03:14 - 03:16And Dom - you'll have to go, not because I have a better replacement
03:19 - 03:23You've been wearing that weird gilet for 2 weeks now
03:25 - 03:26I'm supposed to be the scruffy one
03:31 - 03:33What's left for me - is to resign
03:40 - 03:46Let "Magic Grandpa" be PM and own this total Brexit debacle
03:46 - 03:49before they realise that this Emperor has no clothes
03:53 - 03:56I'll go and see the Queen