Every polling booth has been wrapped in plastic
We took down their posters everywhere
and put ours up, here and here
The Blueshirts are out in force on every street
It's been a show of strength, we couldn't have done anything more.
The natural order has been restored
Wentworth will remain a blue ribbon Liberal seat.
There's been a swing...
...of more than 20% from the LNP
Kerryn Phelps has won
All the leftards who said we should run a female candidate in Wentworth, go outside with the women.
What is wrong with these Eastern suburbs' bastards?
We are Wentworth's born to rule party
This is a nightmare: Independent, Jewish AND gay.
And to top it all off, she's a woman!
It's like the politically correct quadrella from Hell!
We have held this seat since federation
That's 1901, long before lesbians were even invented!
I thought she wasn't running because she had HIV, why is she even here?!?
That was just a vicious rumour we tried to start last week.
Well now we're as popular as needles in strawberries... with chlamydia
We were trying to appeal to the party's conservative base
Why not something clever like, "Wentworth, where the bloody hell are you?"
We got our tax cuts through, 5% unemployment,
we gave everyone a bagel
and every surf club a pile of money, except for that schmuck at Tamarama.
No soup for you, Mr ALP surf club president Tim Murray!
We risked WW3 moving the Israeli embassy to Jerusalem
and pissed off every Muslim between here and the Arctic circle
and despite ALL that, they still didn't vote for us!
We backed that ranga clown Hanson that it's #oktobewhite
Noone told me Sharma was Indian
Tony and Potatohead didn't think this one through
Cash splash? It was like a golden shower of cash!
20%? That's the biggest swing
since they hung that wop bastard Mussolini
I blame Halal Mal, his traitor son and the Dickhead for Warringah
We're going to have to lift our prayer game this Sunday
I grew up in bloody Wentworth, my cop dad used to arrest lesbians
Why didn't they elect us?
Don't give up Julie, you might get Veterans' Affairs
It's all good fellas
Don't worry, keep your chins up
We can reinstate Barnaby as Deputy PM
We'll get the band back together.
We exhumed John Howard for this campaign, we could try Menzies next time
After all, I'm a marketing genius, right?
It's not easy being a white male.