| 00:00 - 00:05 | We made them fix our mistake before the exam even began |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Go on students you can do it |
| 00:07 - 00:10 | We made them suffer through a 75 mark coursework for which we gave them no direction on |
| 00:11 - 00:16 | They revised all they could about computers, computing theory and programming |
| 00:17 - 00:21 | So we asked them about onions and carrots |
| 00:21 - 00:24 | Onions |
| 00:29 - 00:31 | Onions |
| 00:31 - 00:34 | It was the first question of a computer sceince paper |
| 00:38 - 00:40 | Onions |
| 00:41 - 00:47 | We made the next question easy enough about reverse polish notation and stacks |
| 00:47 - 00:50 | For the third question we made them think it was going to be easy |
| 00:50 - 00:56 | And then we made them fill in a seven mark trace table on dijkstras algorithm |
| 00:58 - 00:59 | Dijkstras Algorithm |
| 00:59 - 01:01 | The table was basically empty when they finished |
| 01:04 - 01:06 | If they even knew what the variables were |
| 01:06 - 01:08 | We just made them all letters |
| 01:13 - 01:14 | Onions |
| 01:14 - 01:16 | By the end of Section A most students for that was the difficult bit done with |
| 01:16 - 01:20 | Of course it wasnt |
| 01:21 - 01:27 | We made section B and C okay to make lull them into a false sense of security |
| 01:35 - 01:36 | And then for section D |
| 01:36 - 01:39 | We asked them to do 2 hours worth of programming in 70 minutes |
| 01:41 - 01:44 | Of course we made the theory behind the programming easy |
| 01:44 - 01:47 | We needed a reason to justify the mark boundaries being so high |
| 01:47 - 01:49 | So we can shaft them one last time |
| 01:50 - 01:53 | So we gave them 9 marks for a binary search |
| 01:54 - 01:56 | 9 marks |
| 01:56 - 01:58 | A binary search for 9 marks |
| 01:58 - 02:02 | And if they managed to finish that we made them calculate the frequency of letters in a text document |
| 02:05 - 02:07 | Why? |
| 02:10 - 02:11 | 9 marks |
| 02:11 - 02:13 | That was for 9 marks too |
| 02:15 - 02:17 | You can't even do anything with that information |
| 02:17 - 02:20 | It's completely useless |
| 02:21 - 02:28 | And then if they managed to finish that we made them read a full page of useless information |
| 02:29 - 02:30 | Completely useless? |
| 02:30 - 02:32 | Completely useless |
| 02:36 - 02:39 | The exams only 2 and a half hours |
| 02:40 - 02:42 | Section D took 2 hours to do |
| 02:50 - 02:55 | Maybe they can blame their tears on the onions |
| 02:56 - 02:58 | Was the time pressure too much? |
| 02:58 - 03:04 | Yeah probably but it's there fault anyway for taking A Levels |
| 03:04 - 03:09 | They'll be doing them again next year |
| 03:09 - 03:11 | We gave them no direction on how to study this course |
| 03:16 - 03:20 | And no teachers either |
| 03:23 - 03:26 | Just really bad Powerpoints |
| 03:31 - 03:36 | And a three boxes containing vegtables with the wrong labels on |
