| 00:00 - 00:03 | News is in, copies of |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Oliver Van Outen's |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | latest book has been |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | delivered throughout Norfolk |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | including to your local library |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | People will not believe |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | anything in it |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Heir Gru.... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | the book is..... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | already nominated for a Pulitzer |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and is a New York Times bestseller |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone out, except for Rennie, Herd, and Dildo Dan |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | How could you let this happen? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I told you we should have put trackers |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | on more cars. Neidle, Rosser, Sanjay...but you said no! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | now everyone is reading about how I'm a fraud |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | and beleving these lies |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | come from ace reporter Oliver Van Outen |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | you are all useless, Rennie you |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | couldn't even fit a simple tracker!!!! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | It's not my fault... |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | I don't want to hear excuses, you got me nicked |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | but Gru she saw me do it |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Then you should have been more careful, |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I told you to wear a mask! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Now I'm looking at 10 years |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | they will bugger me to death in prison!! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | And Dildo Dan you wet yourself when |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Green Jellyfish was raided!! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | I am surrounded by incompetence and cowardice! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Now Rosser and Neidle mock me |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | in print! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I created Oliver Van Outen |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Me, Gru Christophi...not Neidle, not Rosser |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | How dare they use him against me! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I will write my own book! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | "Gru Christophi the people's tax champion" |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | It will be a masterpiece |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | I will tell the story of how I |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | single handed saved the R&D industry |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Then people will stop calling me Gru! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry Nicki, I'm sure Dan didn't really wet himself |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I cannot trust anyone |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | to write my book, so I shall do it myself |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | my English is perfect. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I shall require a typewriter |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | some paper, that white liquid |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | for when you make a mistake. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Make it so. |
