00:00 - 00:03 | Sir, there is something we need to tell you before dinner |
00:04 - 00:05 | We just received word you will need to report for jury duty in Florida |
00:05 - 00:07 | Here in Florida, where many Jews live. |
00:08 - 00:12 | George Zimmerman killed Trayvon Martin and then the liberal media got ahold of the story |
00:12 - 00:15 | The trial is expected to last a couple of weeks |
00:17 - 00:21 | George Zimmerman sounds like a Jew name so he's probably guilty. Just tell the court thats my vote. |
00:24 - 00:26 | Sir, |
00:27 - 00:28 | He's.. |
00:30 - 00:32 | Zimmerman is like a Mexican or something |
00:34 - 00:36 | He might also be a "Crazy Ass Cracker" |
00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who has never served on Jury Duty, leave the room right now |
01:13 - 01:15 | What the fuck is this shit? |
01:15 - 01:17 | Aint nobody got time for that! |
01:18 - 01:23 | They take away your phone's and lock you in a goddamn room for weeks! |
01:25 - 01:28 | I cant even jackoff in that state without getting a sunburn |
01:29 - 01:31 | On top of it, theres nothing but retired Jews there! |
01:31 - 01:34 | I already missed my last vacay because of Super Storm Sandy |
01:34 - 01:37 | Now you're going to take away my summer break too?? |
01:37 - 01:40 | You all can go fuck yourselves |
01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, there's alway late summer or fall break |
01:42 - 01:46 | Shut up you fucking nerd |
01:46 - 01:48 | Sir, Im just trying to help |
01:48 - 01:52 | Well you fucking suck more than jury duty |
01:53 - 01:54 | Fuck my ass what else? |
01:56 - 01:57 | That mother fucker Zimmerman was probably just defending himself |
01:57 - 02:00 | Next you're gonna tell me he was the neighborhood watch |
02:00 - 02:03 | Why the fuck is this even making the news? |
02:04 - 02:08 | Its just minority on minority crime. I hear about it on BET videos all the time |
02:08 - 02:13 | And you're telling me I cant celebrate 4th of July now |
02:14 - 02:16 | They wont even let me Tweet while on the goddamn jury.... |
02:17 - 02:21 | How the fuck am I supposed to see pictures of peoples ugly children and their dogs sleeping? |
02:27 - 02:29 | Im currently watching Season 3 of The Walking Dead |
02:30 - 02:34 | Those poor fuckers keep looking for that little shit Carl every day |
02:34 - 02:36 | Where the fuck is Carl? Not where he's supposed to be. Thats for sure |
02:41 - 02:42 | Oh Carl... |
02:43 - 02:47 | Now Its just going to be even longer before I know if they kill that asshole Governor |
02:48 - 02:53 | Goddamn, this will also delay Game of Thrones for me. |
02:54 - 02:56 | Ive never even seen the first episode |
02:56 - 02:59 | But you fuckers keep talking about it at lunch and I feel left out. |
03:00 - 03:02 | And I wanna see some tits on TV too |
03:04 - 03:07 | Dont worry, he just wants to see your tits |
03:14 - 03:16 | I supposed I could have someone TiVo it for me. |
03:19 - 03:23 | I was really hoping to spend the early summer getting white girl wasted |
03:25 - 03:26 | Now what... |
03:31 - 03:33 | Shit, I never got the insurance on my flight for priceline.com |
03:40 - 03:46 | I am going to make this painful for everyone on the jury |
03:46 - 03:49 | I am going to bang every female juror before this thing is over |
03:53 - 03:56 | YOLO |