| 00:00 - 00:03 | My Führer, we have received news from the quantum computing front. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | The FeMo-cofactor problem... |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | ...has been solved to chemical accuracy. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Excellent. Finally, the quantum supremacy we promised investors. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | My Führer... it was solved classically. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I'm sorry? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Zhai et al. used classical algorithms. 76 orbitals. No qubits. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | They achieved chemical accuracy... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | ...on a standard computer. |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | My Führer, this was THE benchmark. The whole justification for quantum chemistry. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Every quantum resource estimate cited this exact problem. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Those who still believe quantum will beat classical in our lifetime, leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | All quantum computing investors... |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | ...and PR managers who told the press we were five years away... |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | ...and anyone who put "quantum advantage" in a grant proposal this decade, please step outside. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | (officers file out) |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | (officers file out) |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | It's been THIRTY YEARS! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Thirty years of promises and billions of dollars! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Every year — "quantum advantage is just around the corner"! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | FeMo-co was THE problem! The holy grail! |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Everyone agreed it was BEYOND classical computing! It was in every quantum roadmap! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | And now a tensor network paper just SOLVES it?! |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | 76 orbitals! 152 qubits worth of problem! Done classically! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | To CHEMICAL ACCURACY! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Do you understand what chemical accuracy means?! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | That was supposed to be quantum computing's unique selling point! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Tech companies and startups! We have all cited this exact problem! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Drug discovery! Nitrogen fixation! Room-temperature superconductors! WHERE ARE THEY?! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Classical DMRG and AFQMC just keep getting better while we wait for error correction! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Garnet Chan's group did what quantum computers couldn't do in three decades! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | On a CLASSICAL computer! With 89 pages showing their work! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | My Führer, quantum computing still has applications in cryptography— |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | THEORETICAL cryptography! Shor's algorithm needs millions of logical qubits! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Remember Google's 2019 "quantum supremacy"? Classical computers matched it by 2022! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Every quantum advantage claim gets classically refuted within months! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | And now the ONE chemistry problem nobody thought classical could touch is GONE! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | The whole justification for quantum chemistry hardware — just vanished. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Billions in investment. For this. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | We have been waiting for quantum computers like they are the second coming. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Meanwhile classical algorithms quietly keep solving "impossible" problems. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | DMRG. FCIQMC. AFQMC. Classical methods. Crushing it. Every time. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | My Führer... perhaps this narrows the scope, it doesn't eliminate— |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I told the board we would have quantum advantage in chemistry by 2026! |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | What do I tell them now?! |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | That an arxiv preprint just made our entire roadmap irrelevant?! |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Maybe... maybe there's still a niche. Quantum simulation of non-equilibrium systems... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Error correction is progressing. Logical qubits are improving... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | At least we still have the press releases. |
