00:00 - 00:03 | Ok, guys, we're up shit creek without a paddle. |
00:03 - 00:08 | Turns out this "war thing" was a wee bit more complicated than anticipated. Check the map. |
00:08 - 00:15 | Berlin is in ruins, and we have no backup at all. Fuck. |
00:17 - 00:24 | Call Steiner. He has an army of nazi-ninjas trained by Zombie Bruce Lee himself. Those guys kicks all kinds of arse. |
00:24 - 00:26 | Mein führer ... |
00:27 - 00:28 | ... Steiner ... |
00:31 - 00:33 | Steiner is bedridden with the measles. |
00:33 - 00:37 | Someone told him about autism, and he didn't bother getting vaccinated. |
00:53 - 00:58 | If you've had your boostershots, leave the room ... NOW. |
01:13 - 01:15 | Measles?! MEASLES?!?! |
01:15 - 01:18 | Steiner is in bed, jerking off WITH FUCKING MEASLES?!?! |
01:18 - 01:24 | For fucks sake, our healthcare system works better than that, doesn't it?! |
01:25 - 01:28 | What about the mandatory vaccination demands we introduced in the army?! |
01:29 - 01:31 | DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT WAS FOR FUN?!?! |
01:31 - 01:34 | It was introduced to avoid shit like this! Generals on sick leave?! WHAT THE FUCK?!? |
01:34 - 01:36 | Fuck me, |
01:34 - 01:36 | this is embarrassing. |
01:34 - 01:37 | WHAT KIND OF AN INBRED ASSHAT ... |
01:37 - 01:40 | ...CONTRACTS AVOIDABLE CHILDHOOD DISEASES AS AN ADULT?!?! HUH?!?! |
01:40 - 01:42 | Mein führer, I don't think ... |
01:42 - 01:46 | UNVACCINATED INBRED ASSHATS, THAT'S WHO !!! |
01:46 - 01:48 | Mein führer, there are websites online that clearly states ... |
01:48 - 01:52 | THERE ARE MORONIC DICKHEADS ONLINE, AND THANKS TO THOSE DICKHEADS ... |
01:53 - 01:54 | ... OUR ENTIRE WAR ENTERPRISE IS FUCKED, THANKS TO SODDING MEASLES! |
01:56 - 02:00 | You're worried about autism? Is that it?! |
02:00 - 02:03 | Well, if you're not autistic by now, I'M SURE YOU'LL BE FINE, CRAPBRAINS! |
02:04 - 02:08 | You're not autistic, you're a fucking idiot! That's your problem! |
02:08 - 02:13 | And thanks to you and your "websites" Berlin is in ruins, and Steiner is in bed with measles! Brilliant! |
02:14 - 02:16 | Imagine, I provide a FREE vaccination program. Paid for by the state. |
02:17 - 02:20 | ... and you go "Oh sod that!" and get sick instead?! |
02:20 - 02:23 | You're an even bigger dickhead than Stalin! |
02:27 - 02:30 | You bloody spoiled rentboys! |
02:30 - 02:37 | What's next? Smallpox? Polio?! You wanna conquer Europe or stay in bed with a sodding manflu?! Huh?!? |
02:41 - 02:42 | Fucking internet ... |
02:43 - 02:47 | Where did you come by all this "information", huh? Andrew Wakefields sphincter?! Or some blog written in all caps?!?! |
02:48 - 02:53 | Haven't you noticed how INCREDIBLY backwards ... |
02:53 - 02:56 | ... and not to mention contradictory antivax propaganda is? Huh? |
02:56 - 02:59 | Do you really think I dream of an army consisting only of autists? |
03:00 - 03:03 | WELL RIGHT NOW THAT WOULD ACTUALLY BE APPRECIATED! |
03:04 - 03:08 | Don't worry. No one knows you "liked" Kat Von D on Facebook. |
03:14 - 03:17 | Well, this is fucking brilliant, isn't i? |
03:19 - 03:23 | The war. Lost. Because of measles. |
03:25 - 03:26 | Measles. |
03:31 - 03:33 | Fucking measles, man. |
03:34 - 03:37 | .... |
03:40 - 03:46 | You know, I hope you contract rabies in your assholes, the whole sodding lot of you. |
03:46 - 03:49 | Would have served you right, you know. |
03:53 - 03:56 | Assholes. |