| 00:00 - 00:03 | On a recent road trip... |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Hans asked his partners to feed him |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | while he drove to Nebraska. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | He calls it Hands Free Eating. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | It helps minimize stops. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | And promotes safe driving. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | This is a revolutionary idea. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Meine Fuhrer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Scotty G... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Scotty G and Lloyd refused to feed him. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Not even a taco... |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone that thinks this is a great idea, please leave... |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | What are they thinking?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Think of the time saved! The luxury!!! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | I wish someone fed me while I ransacked Poland! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | A little Bratwurst... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | ...some Schnitzelgruben... |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Hans is a freaking Genius! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | And those clowns at The Zone |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | don't know what a stud they have there! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Meine Fuhrer, Scotty G thought it was demeaning... |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Scotty G was just jealous... |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | No, he didn't! |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | He was too busy eating all the pie himself... |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | "No Hans, I can't..." |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And Lloyd just sat there, useless... |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | licking Funyun dust off his fingers. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | While Hans had to contend... |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | ...with the road and a McRib! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Hans' poor wife has to launder his shirts! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Nothing can get BBQ sauce stains out of clothes! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Even Eva can't get spicy mustard out of my uniforms! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | An then callers harass him after a BYU loss... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | ...and a big Utah win... |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | The man has suffered enough! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Like that Chang fellow... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | He could have called just to praise the Utes after beating Oregon |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | He didn't have to take a shot at BYU. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | He was on hold for nearly an hour |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Hans was totally blind-sided. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | Chang rubbed salt in the wound!!! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's ok, Hans didn't cry... |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe we can show our love... |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | ...with a GameDay sign of Hans eating pie |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | while he's on the toilet. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Or welcoming Matt Wells... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | That ought to cheer him up! |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Hans is the best thing on Utah radio... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | ...keep up the good work! |
