| 00:00 - 00:03 | We diversified your portfolio to anticipate the post-Trump growth |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We chose three sectors... |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Financials, energy and pharma |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | We expected free market insurance, loosened bank regulations |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and a shit ton of US coal and oil production... |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Sure, sure... |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | So, what was my ROI? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | There is... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | There is major economic stagflation, an oil glut |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and tech stocks are hot shit again |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If you trade with RobinHood and own Tesla, Amazon, or Bitcoin... get out |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Are we back in 2001?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Let's just throw money at invisible earnings |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | These cucks don't even know what "stagflation" means! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | May as well buy LuLuLemon |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | BUT THEY HAVE NO EARNINGS |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | "I'll take care of Obamacare first thing" |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | We can't even pass a health care bill with House majority! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | How the hell will we get tax reform?! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | We have a stronger business presence in DC |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Business presence? Ivanka makes handbags! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Fuhrer, they're very nice bags |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | I know, but now I can't even afford one! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | At least we have oil! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Oh wait, no we don't |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | because you actually thought OPEC would stop production |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | like a fucking Christmas charity! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | House prices are rising, consumer confidence is strong |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | but we've got half the middle class up to their tits in student debt |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | My barista has a PHD |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | and works three jobs just to afford his student payments and rent |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | How does that grow economy |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | How will that drive earnings |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | and crank up that ROI |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Earnings... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | The market is all shorts and leveraged ETFs anymore these days |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | It's like the matrix out there. Everywhere I trade, a computer |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Adam Smith is rolling over in his grave |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | "WEALTH of Nations" for Pete's sake... |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | The economy is drinking Diet Coke with a foopah |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | I think your foopah is cute |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | What about developing markets? |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Sure, may as well invest in Venezuela |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | How bout gold |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Bonds, C or lower? |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | At this point I'd rather bet against the market than for it |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | A reset button for something that never started |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Fucking OPEC |
