00:00 - 00:03 | SIr, your plan to get top-level talent |
00:04 - 00:05 | to endorse your campaign |
00:05 - 00:07 | is going well. |
00:08 - 00:12 | We have gotten several great names |
00:12 - 00:15 | from Hollywood |
00:17 - 00:19 | Oh good. Top Level you say? |
00:19 - 00:21 | Like A-listers? |
00:24 - 00:26 | Well, not exactly. |
00:27 - 00:28 | More like Jon Voight |
00:31 - 00:33 | And Scott Baio and Kirstie Alley. |
00:34 - 00:36 | The Rock said NO. |
00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone who still loves the Rock should leave. Now. |
01:13 - 01:15 | Are you telling me my endorsements from |
01:15 - 01:17 | the KKK and Isis |
01:18 - 01:23 | didn't sway them? They love me! |
01:25 - 01:28 | Putin endorsed me! |
01:29 - 01:31 | and the Proud Boys! |
01:31 - 01:34 | and Kayne West, briefly! |
01:34 - 01:37 | ... before he dropped out. |
01:37 - 01:40 | What does Biden have that I do not? |
01:40 - 01:42 | He does have silver hair. |
01:42 - 01:46 | Mine could be silver if I want! |
01:46 - 01:48 | He has good policies and he doesn't golf. |
01:48 - 01:52 | I only golfed three or four times... |
01:53 - 01:54 | a week. |
01:56 - 01:57 | No, I suppose it's his wife. |
01:57 - 02:00 | She actually likes him. |
02:00 - 02:03 | Mine won't even hold my hand! |
02:04 - 02:08 | And she never hugs me. |
02:08 - 02:13 | Just because I cheated a few times! |
02:14 - 02:16 | And got her sick with Covid-19! |
02:17 - 02:21 | and paid off that porn star. |
02:27 - 02:29 | You'd think she'd forgive and forget! |
02:30 - 02:34 | She never thinks about my feelings. |
02:34 - 02:36 | I am a man with needs. |
02:41 - 02:42 | I haven't been golfing |
02:43 - 02:47 | for several weeks! |
02:48 - 02:53 | And now Rudy has been caught |
02:54 - 02:56 | with his hands down his pants. |
02:56 - 02:59 | This is Borat's second movie |
03:00 - 03:02 | and he still managed to fool us! |
03:04 - 03:07 | Borat is very sneaky. |
03:14 - 03:16 | Well, I am glad my town hall went well |
03:19 - 03:23 | and that it beat Biden's |
03:25 - 03:26 | in terms of viewers. |
03:31 - 03:33 | Does Tom have a cousin or something |
03:40 - 03:46 | that he doesn't talk to? |
03:46 - 03:49 | I guess that is too much to hope for. |
03:53 - 03:56 | I don't think this is going well. |