| 00:00 - 00:03 | All the major states are under a shelter in place |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Coronavirus infections are starting |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to plateau or decrease here |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | here |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and here. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | So if we just stay sheltered, the virus... |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | ...will be gone by the Summer ALTA season |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Governor Kemp... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Governor Kemp is re-opening Georgia this Friday |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Haircuts, bowling, even tattoo places. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | If your Zoom background is a beach, cartoon, or mansion, please leave. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Is there a radio contest for the first person... |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | to get a tattoo of a bulldog in facemask?!!! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | How much could Stars and Strikes possibly have donated to the Kemp campaign?! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Do those fat ass bowlers already own ventilators? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Didn't that state learn their fucking lesson... |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | ABOUT PARTYING AT HALF TIME!! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | At least that cow-tipping Governor |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | isn't opening restaurants! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | In-restaurant dining is coming Monday |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | RESTAURANTS?! How's that even possible? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | If groups stay under 10 people, six feet apart |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Have you been in a Waffle House?! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | They practically cook on your lap. |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | You realize strangers have trouble... |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | ...NOT talking to you in that state. |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | They'll be breathing down each others mouths...and for what? |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | To talk about tailgating and football. |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | You realize they ALL went to the same two colleges right? |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | By some miracle if they have nothing in common... |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | They'll just talk about the fucking pollen |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Granted the pollen is bad there. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | But they act like every year is worse than the last. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | The same trees were in your yard last year. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Can't they find something else to do? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | The WIZometer is a "10" like 200 days out of the year |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I would kill for a 75 degree walk right now. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Maybe this makes perfect sense |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Half of them have never left the state anyway |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | And if they do, they go to the 2nd dumbest state. |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | He might not be talking about Florida. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Disney World will never reopen now. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Its a 9 hour drive from Atlanta. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | 8 hrs if you haul ass. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I had Fast Passes booked for July |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I was going to fly the Millennium Falcon like Han Solo and Chewy. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And if it was as good as everyone says.... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I was willing to wait in line to go again. |
