| 00:00 - 00:03 | Unfortunately sir, we have grave news for you |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | This morning at 3am |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Boob Nightengale reported the following: |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | "MLB expected to discipline Astros within the day... |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | for allegations of sign stealing throughout the 2017 season". |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Eh, I'm not too worried about it. |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | There's no way they did it in the world series |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | my fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Well.... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Jeff Passan just tweeted, |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | The Astros cheated in the postseason as well. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone who has unironically used the phrase "Fraudman", please leave the room now. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | WHAT THE F*** |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. F*** |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | THE DODGERS WOULD HAVE WON THAT SERIES. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | We've tried and failed for 30 years |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | We lose to the Cardinals |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | We lose to the METS |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | We lose to the Cubs |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Then our dream team loses to CHEATERS |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, there's no way to prove the Dodgers would've won |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | BULLSHIT TAKE THEIR RINGS AWAY |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Sir, Yu Darvish tipped his pitches on his own |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Game 7 shouldn't have even happened! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Game 5 is so suspicious now! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Houston's hitters were dialed in... |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | ...on every pitcher's fastball that game! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | All their go-ahead HRs were on tough pitches! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | The Dodgers were grinding at bats... |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | ...and executed really well on offense! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | AND IT DIDN'T EVEN MATTER CAUSE HOUSTON WAS CHEATING! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | And after the dust settles the Astros will still have their rings! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | This is a sad day for Dodger fans. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | A sad day for those of us that bleed blue... |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | ...and live and die with our boys |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Friedman should have prepared. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | EVERYONE KNEW THE ASTROS WERE DOING SOMETHING DIRTY! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Now Kershaw's washed up! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | We failed to sign Cole or Rendon! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Seager can't f***in stay healthy |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | and Kiké's bat will JUST NEVER COME AROUND! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | He doesn't mean that he loves Kiké. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | The young kids are really talented, but.. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | ...that 2017 team was magical. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Doesn't matter now. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | My baseball fanhood is over. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | MLB has allowed cheaters to corrupt their game... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | ...and their only concern is still pace of play. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I will watch soccer from now on. |
