#SNPCIVILWAR

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6,375 views9/1/2018
Pro Union press discuss alleged SNP civil war, things are not going well!

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00:04 - 00:05Reporters are saying the SNP are fighting among themselves
00:05 - 00:07We have seen grannies thrown aff the bus here, here and here.
00:08 - 00:12Wild Haggis have surrounded Holyrood.
00:12 - 00:15Nicola has called in the Independence marchers in Edinburgh
00:17 - 00:19The British media will stop them.
00:19 - 00:21Our Editors will write the usual pish, the public lap it up!
00:24 - 00:26But what about Wings
00:27 - 00:28The Wee Ginger Dug?
00:31 - 00:33The National? They are going to have a Sunday edition!
00:34 - 00:36How can we get them to believe that only 3,500 turned up on the Glasgow march?
00:53 - 00:58Everyone get out, except the Tories, Labour and Liberals
01:13 - 01:15This is a disaster
01:15 - 01:17 If we don't control the press they might vote Yes
01:18 - 01:23They are laughing at us
01:25 - 01:28Where are our reporters, they are supposed to be making this up!
01:29 - 01:31All we have seen are the SNP getting on with the day job!
01:31 - 01:34Phone Trump see if we can use his press secretary
01:34 - 01:37Make up something about Brexit, how great it is going to be.
01:37 - 01:40Tell them Theresa is going on Strictly!
01:40 - 01:42They know it will be awful
01:42 - 01:46Get Gordon and Alistair to make some new vows
01:46 - 01:48The lies will only work so many times
01:48 - 01:52They are supposed to be having a square go
01:53 - 01:54But all we hear is they need more square sausage!
01:56 - 01:57Where is my SNP bad?
01:57 - 02:00Tell them the NHS is safer in our hands.
02:00 - 02:03Tell them Scotland has been part of the union for 5000 years!
02:04 - 02:08Get Jacob to tell them they can have a referendum in 20 years.
02:08 - 02:13Send some more Dark Money
02:14 - 02:16Where's Ruthie when we need her?
02:17 - 02:21I want pictures of SNP MPs arguing with each other
02:27 - 02:29Make it up if you have to.
02:30 - 02:34We can fake anything! They believe us.
02:34 - 02:36Send an undercover reporter to infiltrate the Yes bikers
02:41 - 02:42Tell everyone they ride scooters!
02:43 - 02:47Tell everyone they pay their TV license and love the BBC
02:48 - 02:53Tell them they all ride Dirt bikes.
02:54 - 02:56We must get people to trust our media
02:56 - 02:59Even Jeremy believes the stuff we write for him!
03:00 - 03:02If you can't do better we will have to get Boris involved!
03:04 - 03:07It's OK he doesn't mean it!
03:14 - 03:16Fake news worked for Trump
03:19 - 03:23Fake news can work for us.
03:25 - 03:26We've paid enough for it.
03:31 - 03:33Even the DUP don't believe us anymore.
03:40 - 03:46It's all over, even the North Koreans couldnt make this shit look real.
03:46 - 03:49It doesn't matter anyway, Nicola will play a blinder
03:53 - 03:56Boris for prime minister, what were the odds.........