Simon goes to Red
37 views8/13/2026
Leaving present for Simon for his retirement, going to his favourite restaurant in Guernsey.
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▸Show captions (49)
| 00:00 - 00:03 | we're going to Red today? |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | yes let's go |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | it's near the office |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | we checked and they have a table free |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | we just need to get there quickly |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | let's get going |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | i'm keen to get drinking |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Simon... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | So |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | There is no Musar and |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | they've lost your knife |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Leave the room - Gill, Pollins, Rowland and Randall. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Don't they know who I am? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I am a Lieutenant Bailiff |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | I always use my knife and drink strong Lebanese wine |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Heads will roll. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Are they making me drink French piss instead? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Do they still have Anthony Williams' knife? |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | And where is Marietta nowadays? |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | It's a fucking disgrace! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Simon, I can get us into Costa |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | That place doesn't even have proper knives! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | They do make great toasties |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Piss off with your toasties |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I want my Musar! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And my own knife! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | I can't go to Red without it |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | I don't want to sit with the plebs |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Next you'll be telling me they have no steak! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | And no sharing platter starters? |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | That would be the beginning of the end. |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Go and get me Dave's number |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | He will be able to help me. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | He knows how important I am. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | He always looks after me. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | He knows. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | This is an absolute disgrace! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I am a judge of the Royal Court |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | They must show me respect. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Otherwise I will make them pay! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I will sing to them |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, he won't really. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I have Queen songs on my phone |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I just don't know which one to choose |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Well... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | There's only one choice. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | It just has to be Bohemian Rhapsody |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Just don't make me sing Meatloaf |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I won't do that. |