| 00:00 - 00:03 | we've been told that |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Smokie has now left Germany |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | his plane flew in here |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | then picked him up |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and took him back to Donegal |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | i heard while he was here |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | he took a walk round the Christmas Markets |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | he said |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | he said they were pure shite |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | The Derry one is better |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | But our markets have burgers, sausages, krepes, and butter |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | How dare he insult our markets! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I picked out the stalls myself |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | I even dressed up as Santa for the kids! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | My wife baked those wee snowman cookies |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | and he wouldn't even take some back |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | and put hem out in the process bay |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | all he was interested in was a tiny drink |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | that looked like a reindeer pished in a glass |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | That's the fruit punch my wife makes hi |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | well why hasn't she made me any? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | you know she's while busy |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | not too busy to make Smokie some though |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | was she? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | he just turns up here willy nilly |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | and your wife is all like |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | here, have some fruit punch |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | in the meantime I'm sweating me balls off in a Santa suit |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | and some wee bastard was sick on me |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | is it too much to ask to keep your wains under control, |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | and for someone to get me a drink? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Every year I do Santa |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | and what thanks do I get? |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Bloody tourists drink all the fruit punch |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | pure ragin |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | How would Smokie like it if I went to Derry or Bundoran Christmas Markets? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | and said his wife's cookies were shite |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | and drank all his Guiness |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | and made HIM dress up as Santa |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | and let some wee spide be sick over him |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Calm down, he won't really take you to Derry |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I dunno why I do it anymore |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I think I'll just pack it all in |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | who'll do it then? |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Patrick, you do it |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I'll give you the suit, the beard and my wee bell |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | but your not getting my wife's cookies |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Fuckin Smokie... |
