| 00:00 - 00:03 | The life of a showgirl album |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | will be released |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | on the third of october |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | with Max Martin producing we can expect a very pop-y album |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | like 1989 and Lover |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | With Max producing she will |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | have to visit sweden for the tour |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Führer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Travis |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Travis just poped the question |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | it was just posted on insta |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Can everyone who did not go to eras at least two times and made their own outfits leave the room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | He PROPOSED |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | He proposed after only two years |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | she just announced the album on his podcast while we were suffering from Era's withdrawal |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | and all the countdowns hyping us up |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | just waiting for the tour |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | and now she will be busy doing mood boards on pintrest? |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | She releases an album called LIFE OF A SHOWGIRL… |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | …and then decides she won’t SHOW UP?! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Mein Führer… the album will still release on October 3rd— |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | DO NOT SAY OCTOBER 3RD TO ME! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | You can still listen to it on spotify |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | WHAT GOOD IS AN ALBUM IF I CAN’T SCREAM THE LYRICS IN A STADIUM OF 80,000 PEOPLE?! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Am I supposed to sit alone in my living room, holding a glow stick, pretending? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | The choreography! The pyrotechnics! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | The ten costume changes! The surprise acoustic sets! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | All replaced by engagement photos in People Magazine! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Instead of replacing repTV clowning |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | with tour clowning we going to shit post about wedding dresses |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | I dont even know what a Vera Wang is |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I'm just going to have to photoshop Travis to look like Stalin |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I fought in every Ticketmaster war! |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | I survived The Great Queue of 2022! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | I clicked REFRESH until my fingers went numb! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | NUMB! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Do you know what it’s like to be 7,000th in line and still win? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | AND NOW THERE’S NOTHING TO FIGHT FOR! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | All my money saved for VIP packages… |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | All my spreadsheets of setlist predictions… |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | All my outfit planning… destroyed by a tight end with a mustache! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry he will calm down when he hears the Sabrina collab |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | And we all knows what happens next |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | She will be pregnant in a year |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | and then again |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | they will have at least 3 kids |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | and she will be a good mother so |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | we might not have another tour for |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | 10 years |
