| 00:00 - 00:03 | Sir, good news, we have today released … |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | CAE Crew Access |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | It was tested here in Leeds |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Nobody wanted to sign it off, but what do they know? |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | The developers are currently partying in Berlin |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | And has it been … |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | a complete success, yes? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer … |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | It keeps … |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | It keeps crashing and everything is in bloody local time |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and it doesn’t sync with any calendar |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Those who aren’t involved in the project, leave the room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Why is it always you three?! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | What is this bollocks? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | For years we’ve needed a new system |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Other airlines are years ahead |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Years ahead! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | With their fixed rosters and scheduling agreements! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Proper union recognition! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Full loss of licence cover! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Fuhrer, we will endeavour to improve it |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Don’t use ‘endeavour’ with me! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | I know but the word works with the workforce |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | But not with me! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | BOLLOCKS! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | We need them to buy … |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Roster Buster |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | We need 20% kickback from CAE |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Phil will be wanting his shares back |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Where will that leave our bonuses? |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Who is responsible for this shit? |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | The same twat who thought SAP Concur would be a game changer? |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | We had a system that worked |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | It was shit, yes, but not as shit as this. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | CrewApp only crashed when rosters came out |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | CAE Crew Access |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | What total and utter bullshitting bollocks! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Things were so much easier in the early days |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Family friendly flight times |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Well it was largely true, and cheaper too |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | But now we’re too bloody expensive! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don’t worry, easyJet are recruiting |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | There’s only one thing for it … |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I can’t really believe it, but … |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I'm going to have to say it … |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I have never gone back … |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | on anything I’ve done ... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | even when I was wrong, just ask my wife. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Reinstate CrewApp |
