| 00:00 - 00:03 | I'm afraid I have bad news Justin. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | We've just announced our commemorative jersey |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | after collaborating with Holsworthy Army Barracks |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Despite all due diligence, we've stuffed up... again |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and now NRL 360 and the Daily Mail are having a field day. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | NRL 360? What's Hooper's problem? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Still upset about no invite for lunch at Grappa? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Um... Justin |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | The troops... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | The troops on the jersey are Americans |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | It's a stock image, no Aussies |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone except Tim, Benji, and Robbie leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | They're ripping into me again? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | They're calling for me to be sacked again? |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | They don't like me playing Candy Crush in the dressing room? |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | They don't like American troops on our jersey? |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | This vexes me greatly. |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | I get a trendy haircut, |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | I grow a bangin' stash! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | I was the star of Tales from Tiger Town! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, I really don't think that is our biggest problem. |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Oh really? What do you think our biggest problem is? |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Sir, we're 0-5 for the second year running. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Our finances have never looked better! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Hat sales through the roof! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And you want to bring up on-field results? |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | It's a new forward pack. You are the new coaches! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | And you come at me about results? |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Stop picking Brooks and we'd have a win by now |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | We had a decent halfback, that Hastings kid! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | But noooo, Sheenius wanted to play him at lock! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | You had them working on attack all pre-season apparently! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Hire Sheens again... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | This was Buzz's idea, but I get all the blame! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Who invited him to Grappa? |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | It was that Hagipantelis's fault! |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | He practically lives there! Has a bed out the back and everything! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Strutting around in his Fedora, flapping his gums to anyone who'll listen |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Threatening to sue everybody... |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I built a Centre of Excellence! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I give token merch to Harry Triguboff! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's ok, the five-year plan will work! |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Pea-heart Douehi at fullback? |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Luke Brooks and his fifth-tackle options... pitiful |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | That Imp. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | I could play better... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Did you see me at Suncorp in my painted-on Tee? |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And my trendy trackie-dacks? |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Put me in coach.... |
