Hitlers Hemp Crop
1,556 views4/5/2020
Hitler calls a meeting with his farm managers and doesnt like the numbers hes hearing.
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| 00:00 - 00:03 | Planting reports coming in from all over the country |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | 100,000 acres here |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | 100,000 acres there |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Most of these acres are cbd and not fiber |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Even the corn and soybean farmers are growing it |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | How many tinctures does and an average acre produce? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | Say 900mgs |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My hemp lord.. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Um... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | On average 25,000 |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Of Full Spec 900s |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | All pot smokers, drop outs, and hippies leave the room |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | This is asinine!! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | Plant hemp you told me and youll make millions! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | 50,000 acres will supply half the damn country for a year! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Fucking isolate will be $750 by Christmas! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | And we dont even have a processing contract yet! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | I was suppose to buy a new Lamborghini this fall! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | I already posted a pic on Instagram of it! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | What will I tell my followers?! They call me hemp king! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Maybe it will be a bad hail year |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | 90% of the country would have to get hailed out to save us |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My hemp lord most dont know how to grow |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Fucken pot heads can grow the shit! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Its a fucken weed! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Where did they get the seed money! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | I paid $5 a clone! Who else could afford that! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | I booked my trip to Wynn already! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Me and Musk were going to pop bottles together |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | I wont even be able to pop a bottle of Andres |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Might as well cancel my dryer I ordered from China |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Do these fuckers know what it costs to weed! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | The Mexicans want $20 a fucken hour this year |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | And they work slower than molasses in January |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | We will have to scrap hand harvesting |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | And just hire combines |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Dry the shit in the field and pray to God it dont mold! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | And get rid of them pot heads! I told you not to hire hippies! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Ill shoot the next fucker I see with dreadlocks |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | And someone better call the plastic surgeon |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | And cancel my bitch wifes face lift |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Dont worry you already look like a kardashian |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe the FDA will approve it by fall |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | That might help market demand |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | And we can try bailing the stalks |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | And sell for industrial fiber |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I heard thats worth $200 a year ton this year |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And sell my condo to pay for the Lamborghini |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Should of planted corn |