| 00:00 - 00:03 | Your book sale numbers have come in. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Your first tome has sold 2 copies. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | And your second also 2 copies. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | That makes 4 copies... |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | If we don't count the ones you gave to family. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | It's okay, I've been emailing this hot chick... |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | She's going to help me with the book. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Father Malley... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Cat... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Your son has been emailing you as Cat. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | He's basically been telling you so for weeks. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who has not read my books leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | WHAT THE FUCKskidaddle!? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | She fell in love with me! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | We were going to sue my son together... |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I have been whacking off to her... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | I told her she made my libido jingle! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | I cannot believe my son would do this to me. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | I taught him everything he knows! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | How to dig holes... |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Father Malley, you were the one who |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | HOW NOT TO LAUGH AT CATS |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Yes, he's done well for himself but |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | I bet it is that Jew that made him do it. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Uneven oxen! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | And now that hussy with the kids. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Free babysitting is what she wants! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | All undoing the great work I have done raising my son! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | He does not even care when I make his mother sad anymore. |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | A fine woman, sure, but no Cat. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | I could have been a contender. |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | But then Ronald Reagan ruined it all! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | I finally catch myself a piece of ass... |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Do I not deserve that? |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | After my years of bringing God's wisdom to the people? |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Feeble minds... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Double talk DOUBLE TALK IT IS ALL NOTHING MORE THAN HEAVENLY DOUBLE TALK |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | I was going to send her a photogram of my member. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Once I had figured out how that electric telephone works. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | She really made my libido jingle... |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | LIBIDO JINGLE! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | If you want to throw up it's fine. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | My own son... |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | How can he speak to me ever again? |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I should email Cat... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Maybe she wants my wisdom. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | I just have to wait until my wife goes to sleep. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Then I will start the electric typewriter. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | And ask her if she is lying to me. |
