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Goon Discusses Taxgate
What better place to discuss the recent Taxgate scandal than a television interview?

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00:00 - 00:05These are serious allegations
00:05 - 00:07but all seem true.
00:07 - 00:10Lowtax is a serial wifebeater
00:11 - 00:16He relied on mods to silence goons
00:17 - 00:21he thought Burt cover it up...
00:21 - 00:24Burt!
00:29 - 00:31Burt Sexual!
00:31 - 00:34The mod that didn't know if hot-tubs had covers and had to ask GBS!
00:38 - 00:40Burt!
00:41 - 00:47All he did was ban people instead
00:47 - 00:50He didn't even try to be smart about it
00:50 - 00:56"Oh, you don't believe Lowtax? Off you go!"
00:58 - 00:59"Everyone else,"
00:59 - 01:01"just keep giving him free money!"
01:04 - 01:06Lowtax thought he'd fixed the problem
01:06 - 01:08and leased himself a Nissan GTR,
01:13 - 01:14a GTR!
01:14 - 01:16Not only that,
01:16 - 01:20he gorged on Goldbelly cookies!
01:21 - 01:27The most expensive cookies around!
01:35 - 01:36Feeling safe
01:36 - 01:39that Burt had fixed everything he carried on!
01:41 - 01:44Using free money that we gave him in good faith
01:44 - 01:47he carried on eating cookies and beating women
01:47 - 01:49and thought Burt could hide it forever
01:50 - 01:53because Burt's SO GOOD at covering things up
01:54 - 01:56Burt!
01:56 - 01:58"Burt 'ban-hammer' Sexual"
01:58 - 02:02His solution is always to ban people,
02:05 - 02:07rather than fix the problem.
02:10 - 02:11But then again,
02:11 - 02:13good luck fixing Lowtax!
02:15 - 02:17His Patreon
02:17 - 02:20is haemorrhaging numbers
02:21 - 02:28people only ever subscribed because it was him and he constantly complained about money.
02:29 - 02:30Is his content bad then?
02:30 - 02:32Yes, it's fucking terrible!
02:36 - 02:39He thought he was unstoppable,
02:40 - 02:42that Burt would take care of it
02:50 - 02:55and would have free money forever
02:56 - 02:58So what'll happen to Something Awful?
02:58 - 03:04There are rumours Jeffrey will take over,
03:04 - 03:09to try and stop the sinking ship.
03:09 - 03:11Maybe it'll help, I'm not sure,
03:16 - 03:20I'm just thankful it isn't Burt,
03:23 - 03:26Burt Sexual!
03:31 - 03:36and fuck Lowtax for thinking we'd believe him forever