00:00 - 00:03The 2020 Hawkeye recruiting class is nearly complete
00:04 - 00:05We have searched all over Iowa
00:05 - 00:07to find the very best talent
00:08 - 00:12with almost some other P5 offers
00:12 - 00:15We will then attempt to land Ogundele
00:17 - 00:19What about Xavier Foster?
00:19 - 00:21He is still a lock yes?
00:24 - 00:26My Fuhrer
00:27 - 00:28Xavier...
00:31 - 00:33Xavier Foster is a Cyclone
00:34 - 00:36we lost a legacy
00:53 - 01:02Stay here if you actually thought Foster was going to be a Hawkeye. The rest of you get the hell out
01:13 - 01:15Why the hell would Foster come here??
01:15 - 01:17We don't produce NBA talent!
01:18 - 01:23Our coach is only good for cussing out refs
01:25 - 01:28and a kick ass Francon alert system
01:29 - 01:31Even the voice of the hawkeyes
01:31 - 01:34gave up on our recruiting
01:34 - 01:37King Kong ain't coming through those doors men!
01:37 - 01:40What the hell were you all thinking?
01:40 - 01:42My Fuhrer we thought...
01:42 - 01:46You thought what? The 10 year plan would convince Foster??
01:46 - 01:48We told him he'd get playing time
01:48 - 01:52Of course he would, look at us!!
01:53 - 01:54We play 27 players a game
01:56 - 01:57our only game plan is
01:57 - 02:00to aimlessly fall towards the hoop
02:00 - 02:03and shoot free throws
02:04 - 02:08do you think Foster comes here for free throws???
02:08 - 02:13Even when we tried to get a convicted felon a few years ago
02:14 - 02:16he spent more time in jail
02:17 - 02:21than in a Hawkeye uniform
02:27 - 02:29And the atmosphere at Carver
02:30 - 02:34The funeral I was at least week was more lively
02:34 - 02:36I'd rather have a god damn root canal
02:41 - 02:42Than watch this bullshit
02:43 - 02:47Having to walk up 500 steps just to take a piss
02:48 - 02:53And when I get to the top I look back our players
02:54 - 02:56STILL aren't back on defense
02:56 - 02:59We can only offer so much free pizza!
03:00 - 03:02I caught a fan knitting the other day!!
03:04 - 03:07It's okay, you'll still be able to knit during games
03:14 - 03:16The program is dying
03:19 - 03:23Fran only has so many sons left
03:25 - 03:26I suppose...
03:31 - 03:33I'll just give him another extension
03:40 - 03:46Should buy the fans off for another 5 years
03:46 - 03:49We desperately need a tune up
03:53 - 03:56Luckily we have DePaul next