Hitler learns that England lost to Argentina
14 views7/18/2026
Hitler receives the terrible news that England lost 2–1 to Argentina in the World Cup semi-final.
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| 00:00 - 00:03 | My Führer, England took the lead. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | The plan appeared... |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | to be working perfectly. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Tuchel’s organisation was... excellent! and... |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Argentina struggled to create clear chances. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | So England are... |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | ...through to the final. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Not exactly, my Führer. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Argentina... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Argentina equalised late... |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | and finally England lost 2–1. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who predicted England would collapse... leave the room now. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | That is impossible! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | England had a German manager! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Tuchel was personally selected for this mission. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | He was trained at our most secret facility... |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | The Bavarian Academy of Advanced Football Management. |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Only the finest coaches were admitted. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | We called it Operation Three Lions! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Years of preparation! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | He didnt't have enough tactical diagrams! |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | We even taught Tuchel to sing “It’s Coming Home”... |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Not enough hours of AI analysis |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | They only had to defend! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | But no!... |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | They allowed Argentina back into the match! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | The country they were supposed to underestimate! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | England possessed the empire I always wanted! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | They conquered half the planet... |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | then complained when the locals learned cricket! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | They drew borders across continents... |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | without even consulting Google Maps! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Our countries understood each other! |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Love of beer! Love of holidays in Alicante! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Unnecessary confidence before major tournaments! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | But Argentina... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Argentina represents everything I despise! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | A country right in the ass of the world! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Late dinners, late trains... |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | and arguments lasting four hours! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I hate the years I had to spend there! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, we don't have to go back there... |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | And what did Tuchel do after England lost? |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | He surely complained to FIFA! |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Or even Trump... |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | He lost Trump's email... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Then England's Empire has finally been reduced... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | to a bronze-medal argument with France. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | It’s Never Coming Home. |