CMG seeks ways to increase its membership
45 views1/12/2026
CMG's "capo" Lance (played here by Adolf H) calls a meeting with his top-ranking moderators to discuss ways of growing the forum's membership. Things become heated quite quickly...
1 Comment
1
A CMG lurker4 months ago
A brilliant and astute critique of the state of classical music forums today. I'll be signing up immediately! [Will this do? When can I have the cheque?]
▸Show captions (49)
| 00:00 - 00:03 | We've renewed the server contract for 2026. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | It's based in south |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Berlin, near the airport. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | This means we can accept more attachments |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and posters can now insert YouTube videos. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Very good. Does this mean |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | we'll increase the membership? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Listen, Lance... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Certain posters... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Certain posters are causing problems. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Particularly on the Corner Pub. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everybody out except moderators Keitel, Jödel, Krebs and Burgdorf. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | It's outrageous! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | I follow the Corner Pub every day! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | It's nothing but politics and food! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Who cares about bloody food! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | And 'effing politics! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Every day, lefties and right wing fruitcakes! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | And least those foodies avoid flame wars! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | But I bet they're just champagne socialists! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | I must protest boss! Food is apolitical! |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | What the hell do I care about that, you dumb moron! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | But Lance, it's a good way to grow the membership! |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Rubbish! I know what folks want here! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | I'm the boss! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | Can you imagine the Pub |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | with religious nutters |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | regurgitating their faith? |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And don't get me started on contemporary music! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | Like that poster Cervantes or whatever his name is |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | banging on about Berio |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | or music that was banned by that fool Stalin! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | The forum is not an Academy. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | It's for general music lovers. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | And I alone will decide. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | For once and for all... |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | we're a classical music forum! |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Anything else will be off limits, I tell you! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | If not, we're all pay for it! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | With all of our blood we'll pay! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | So that's my last bloody word! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't worry, he accepts A = 430Hz. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | So, a new policy is needed. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | No more politics and no religion. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | It's enough of that. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | The flame wars are over. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | There are plenty of other forums for that kind of thing. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Like Talk Classical, you know what I mean? |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | And no Stockhausen, or else! |