| 00:00 - 00:03 | The cabinet are now all nearly here, prime minister. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Johnson and Gove are two miles away on a tandem |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | moving slowly. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | There's a man at the outer fence called Matt Hancock, trying to do Parkour. |
| 00:12 - 00:14 | Philip Hammond and Greg Clark are here |
| 00:14 - 00:16 | having the world's dullest conversation. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I thought we stopped these Downfall parodies |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | literally years ago. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Theresa- |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | We decided- |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We decided it might be the last chance while you are still prime minister. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | We didn't want to miss the opportunity. |
| 00:53 - 00:56 | I need to address everyone who understands |
| 00:56 - 00:58 | the Facilitated Customs Arrangement |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Who put these people in the cabinet? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | The actual United Kingdom cabinet! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Imagine if these guys were in charge during the War! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | Hitler probably would have won |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Now I design a miraculous fudge |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | so we can leave the EU and not screw the economy |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | And none of them bloody like it! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Did they believe their own bus? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Theresa, using technology to track lorries on the Irish border- |
| 01:42 - 01:44 | I'll count the lorries myself! |
| 01:44 - 01:46 | I'd ask Duncan Smith, but I'm not sure he can go beyond double figures |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Theresa! You're starting to remind me of John Bercow |
| 01:48 - 01:50 | How dare you! |
| 01:50 - 01:52 | Bercow's probably at the bloody tennis! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | While we're locked in a room |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | discussing the NCP and max fac |
| 01:57 - 01:59 | as if they are serious ideas |
| 01:59 - 02:03 | and Barnier's fax machine isn't located directly over his wastepaper bin |
| 02:04 - 02:06 | Does anyone here even care |
| 02:06 - 02:08 | about the Uruguay-France result? |
| 02:08 - 02:11 | At this rate we won't even make it out |
| 02:11 - 02:13 | for Brazil versus Belgium |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | Finally someone is going to properly kick Neymar |
| 02:17 - 02:20 | And well be in here discussing ECJ jurisdiction |
| 02:20 - 02:21 | over agri-food |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Remember the good times |
| 02:30 - 02:32 | Priti flying 7,000 miles to be sacked. |
| 02:32 - 02:34 | Osborne losing £10m at the Standard. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Dominic Grieve voting against his own amendment. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Best of all |
| 02:43 - 02:45 | I was going to sack all of you |
| 02:45 - 02:47 | and give your jobs to Nick Timothy. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Which idiot called a snap election? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | You're going to say that I did. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Well, you try going on a walking holiday in Wales with my husband |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | You, too, will want to get back to work immediately. |
| 03:04 - 03:06 | It's ok |
| 03:06 - 03:07 | It's coming home |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I've been wondering |
| 03:19 - 03:21 | 'Brexit means Brexit' |
| 03:21 - 03:25 | I never said that aloud |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | did I? |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | It could have sounded stupid |
| 03:40 - 03:44 | I've learnt from my mistakes |
| 03:44 - 03:47 | I have a better idea |
| 03:47 - 03:49 | A snap second referendum |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I might even campaign this time |
