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Hitler Finds Out About the Dragon Awards
The Social Justice Generals inform their Great Leader about the formation of the Dragon Awards.

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00:00 - 00:03We are continuing our campaign against the Puppies.
00:04 - 00:05They've succeeded at using facts,
00:05 - 00:07but we believe our feels can still trump their logic.
00:08 - 00:12Even better, Vox has turned his followers against the Sad Puppies,
00:12 - 00:15and that lets us pretend he's the one in charge, and not the many Puppy women and minorities.
00:17 - 00:19Good. We'll No Award while they self-destruct.
00:19 - 00:21The Hugo Awards will remain preeminent.
00:24 - 00:26Great Leader . . .
00:27 - 00:28DragonCon . . .
00:31 - 00:33DragonCon has just announced their own major award.
00:34 - 00:36And it already looks cool.
00:53 - 00:58Everyone . . . out. Except Scalzi, Gerrold, and the Social Media Brigade.
01:13 - 01:15Do you understand what's at stake!?
01:15 - 01:17We've spent YEARS gaining control of the Hugos!
01:18 - 01:23We need them to control public perception of quality in science fiction and fantasy!
01:25 - 01:28We can't just let mere READERS decide what makes good genre fiction,
01:29 - 01:31not when SF&F lets people dream of freedom from drudgery
01:31 - 01:34and imagine alternate worlds where we don't control their every word and action!
01:34 - 01:37And it was going fine until you idiots goaded Larry Correia
01:37 - 01:40into starting Sad Puppies in the first place and drawing public attention --
01:40 - 01:42Great Leader, we had no idea that a bestselling author could draw attention to our plans!
01:42 - 01:46You idiot! Bestselling authors have huge fanbases!
01:46 - 01:48Great Leader, you taught us that popularity and quality are mutually incompat--
01:48 - 01:52You are so idiotic that you've begun to believe our own propaganda!
01:53 - 01:54That's precisely why they're so dangerous.
01:56 - 01:57We had to convince them that real art was ugly.
01:57 - 02:00That if they don't get it, the problem is with them, not us.
02:00 - 02:03Force them to believe that we are the sole arbiters of taste, understanding, and quality.
02:04 - 02:08But if we can't pretend that the Hugos are the biggest award in SF&F,
02:08 - 02:13if DragonCon can leverage its hordes to vote on whether a book or movie or TV show is good or not,
02:14 - 02:16then the Hugo Awards will lose prestige in the field,
02:17 - 02:21and eventually we'll look just like what we already are: elitists who don't actually care about fiction!
02:27 - 02:29We'll have to start over.
02:30 - 02:34We've spent so long disdaining DragonCon that we don't have people in control.
02:34 - 02:36Not since Ed Kramer got convicted of pedophilia.
02:41 - 02:42Start a new campaign.
02:43 - 02:47DragonCon is controlled by . . . by racists and misogynists and . . . and GamerGate!
02:48 - 02:53We have to discredit the Dragon Awards before they even have nominations,
02:54 - 02:56or else people will wonder why DragonCon is so much larger than Worldcon.
02:56 - 02:59Why we can't get more than a few thousand to show up, and they have SIXTY thousand without even trying,
03:00 - 03:02who flock to a convention thinking that it's supposed to be FUN!
03:04 - 03:07Don't worry. Fun will never trump social justice.
03:14 - 03:16If we can't discredit them, it's over.
03:19 - 03:23There's no way an Ancillary Noun novel will win at DragonCon.
03:25 - 03:26We'll fade into obscurity.
03:31 - 03:33All because Scalzi over there decided to get in Correia's face.
03:40 - 03:46It would take years to infect DragonCon. They're masters of having fun wrong, and won't have a serious discussion
03:46 - 03:49about why skin color and sexuality always trump creativity.
03:53 - 03:56At least we still have Twitter.