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Zero Downfall
A cheery view of the zero covidians as they grapple with government policy

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00:00 - 00:03The lockdown is continuing as planned
00:04 - 00:05Cases are falling
00:05 - 00:07The R rate is decreasing
00:08 - 00:12Across the country
00:12 - 00:15In England, Scotland, Wales
00:17 - 00:19Great. A few months more and
00:19 - 00:21we'll reach zero covid
00:24 - 00:26Sir.
00:27 - 00:28There's...
00:31 - 00:33There's a working vaccine
00:34 - 00:36People don't care about zero covid anymore
00:53 - 00:58Everyone out. Except for Sridhar, Mitchie, Scally and Edmunds
01:13 - 01:15WHAT IN THE HELL
01:15 - 01:17WHY WON'T THEY LOCKDOWN?
01:18 - 01:239 MORE MONTHS AND WE'D HAVE ZERO COVID
01:25 - 01:28But no, they want in person schooling
01:29 - 01:31And shops and FUCKING CINEMAS
01:31 - 01:34And to socialise with other humans
01:34 - 01:37To go out DRINKING AND SHAGGING
01:37 - 01:40Don't they realise we ERADICATED SMALLPOX??
01:40 - 01:42Sir, eradicating smallpox took 21 years
01:42 - 01:46Fine FUCKING POLIO THEN!
01:46 - 01:48Sir... that's not been eradicated either
01:48 - 01:52Sod off with your excuses! Why can't they put their lives on hold?
01:53 - 01:54CLOSE THE BORDERS INDEFINITELY
01:56 - 01:57It's like they're not just existing
01:57 - 02:00solely for the purpose of reaching Zero Covid
02:00 - 02:03instead they think if there are no deaths
02:04 - 02:08they don't need to stay locked up in their houses
02:08 - 02:13That we can just vaccinate the vulnerable and move on
02:14 - 02:16THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT THE CAUSE
02:17 - 02:21THEY DON'T WANT TO BE NEW ZEALAND
02:27 - 02:29We tried scaring them with variants
02:30 - 02:34We told them that mutant Covid was about
02:34 - 02:36But no, they keep producing studies
02:41 - 02:42saying the vaccines still work!
02:43 - 02:47And THAT WE CAN REFORMULATE NEW VACCINES!
02:48 - 02:53AS THOUGH ITS THAT EASY. AND WE CAN LIVE WITH THIS
02:54 - 02:56And the goverments going along with this?!
02:56 - 02:59Something about the economy & the mental health problems of lockdown
03:00 - 03:02Like they care about things other than COVID!
03:04 - 03:07Don't worry Trish, you can still wear pantyliners in your facemask
03:14 - 03:16I don't know what to do
03:19 - 03:23I built a media career on this
03:25 - 03:26I was going to write a book
03:31 - 03:33I took a loan out for an extension
03:40 - 03:46All us pundits will be irrelevant. They won't want us on Channel 4
03:46 - 03:49Or the BBC. Probably not even on ITV
03:53 - 03:56I'll have to go back to normal work