| 00:00 - 00:03 | We discovered a secret tunnel underneath Heinz field. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | Which led us to other tunnels |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | under every NFL stadium. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | From the tunnels we were able to see and hear everything that went on. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | They were full of gray hoodies and deflated footballs |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | The Falcons are too good |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | for it to matter. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Fuhrer.. |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | We've.. |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | We've just received the alert from ESPN Go. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | The Falcons blew their lead. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Leave the room if you prefer soccer, hockey, baseball or basketball. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | I WANT TO DIE! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | SOMEONE PLEASE KILL ME. |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | For once the Steelers had a healthy roster. |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I hate Bill Belichick |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | Tell me how they blew it. |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | Since Polamalu left they've had no Strong Safety. |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | If they think Todd Haley's any match for that evil demon |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | FUCK NOT EVEN LE'VEON, BEN, A.B. |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Fuhrer even the commissioner is trying to stop them |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | GOOD FUCKING LUCK. THEY CAN'T BE STOPPED. |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Fuhrer. They can't win everything. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | They've already made football totally suck. |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | BILL YOU'VE WON. |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | The Falcons had the best offense. |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Julio could have caught anything Matt threw |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | Dakota Freeman could run through a brick wall |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And Julian Edelman is like Tom's little annoying sidekick |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | And even without Tom and when Gronkowski broke both his legs.. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | They were still good. |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | The AFC is a fascist regime and Belichick is Stalin. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | We need to kill Bill Belichick. |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | You know what I want? I want to kill him myself. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | So football's interesting again. |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Fuck Robert Kraft. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | If New England wins next year I am destroying the entire world. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Maybe that will motivate the fucking Falcons. |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | Of course the Steelers won't win. |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Why do you think Blount left the Steelers. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | We're not even as smart as LeGarrette Blount! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry Tanya. Brady will retire soon. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | When I first started watching football |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | I was just an innocent child. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | I was good. |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | My life is meaningless. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | Our only hope is that Bill will die very soon. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Of course he probably planned for that. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Fuck Mike Tomlin. |
