A Day in the Life of Square

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Square hardware and software! It's new! It's exciting! It's--

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00:00 - 00:05Everyone's excited to get the new Square
00:05 - 00:07hardware out.
00:07 - 00:10But I'm sitting here wondering,
00:11 - 00:16"How, exactly, is this going to absolutely fuck my world up?"
00:17 - 00:21Day 1: "Install or Defer Critical Update?"
00:21 - 00:24DEFER.
00:29 - 00:31D E F E R.
00:31 - 00:34They made it an option to
00:38 - 00:40D E F E R.
00:41 - 00:47Sure, let's give people the option to completely ignore the updates.
00:47 - 00:50This will be fine.
00:50 - 00:56This will be just f--
00:58 - 00:59I CAN'T.
00:59 - 01:01I CAN'T SAY IT.
01:04 - 01:06IT'S NOT FINE.
01:06 - 01:08NOT AT ALL.
01:13 - 01:14F u c k m e.
01:14 - 01:16Just fuck me up.
01:16 - 01:20And not just the updates!
01:21 - 01:27IF ONE PERSON EDITS AN ITEM
01:35 - 01:36AND SAVES IT
01:36 - 01:39IT SAVES EVERYWHERE.
01:41 - 01:44But it's not all bad!
01:44 - 01:47No more refreshing!
01:47 - 01:49Better battery life!
01:50 - 01:53USB-C char--
01:54 - 01:56D E F E R
01:56 - 01:58DEFERTHEUPDATES.
01:58 - 02:02At first it doesn't seem that bad.
02:05 - 02:07But then...
02:10 - 02:11You remember.
02:11 - 02:13"Oh, that's right.
02:15 - 02:17These people using these
02:17 - 02:20are capable of absolute destruction."
02:21 - 02:28And it's not just the users now. It could be anyone.
02:29 - 02:30--Allies!
02:30 - 02:32My own team!
02:36 - 02:39MY ALLIES!
02:40 - 02:42The ones supposed to be helping me!
02:50 - 02:55I'm sorry. I can't help myself.
02:56 - 02:58--So what do you do?
02:58 - 03:04Other than set myself on fire?
03:04 - 03:09Because sometimes that's really the only right answer.
03:09 - 03:11Jesus Christ.
03:16 - 03:20But it can only get bett--
03:23 - 03:26D E F E R
03:31 - 03:36That's it. I'm done with this.