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Commissioner Scorpio reacts to the news of Cap winning again

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00:00 - 00:03As you can see, Commissioner Scorpio,
00:04 - 00:05his fourth round pick
00:05 - 00:07was dead when he drafted him.
00:08 - 00:12Then he somehow earned the first round bye
00:12 - 00:15and advanced to the finals against Nick.
00:17 - 00:19I'm not worried one bit.
00:19 - 00:21Nick will beat him.
00:24 - 00:26Sir, the finals already happened.
00:27 - 00:28What I mean is.....
00:31 - 00:33I'm sorry to say, Greg, but...
00:34 - 00:36Cap won the league again
00:53 - 00:58If you have won a fantasy championship, please leave the room.
01:13 - 01:15How did we let this happen!!??
01:15 - 01:17He shows up to the draft
01:18 - 01:23with his brain swimming in chemicals.
01:25 - 01:28Pablo Escobar claims him as a dependent
01:29 - 01:31on his tax returns!!
01:31 - 01:34How does he do it two years in a row?!
01:34 - 01:37I've never won anything starting
01:37 - 01:40back from midget hockey!!!
01:40 - 01:42You're short but I wouldn't say midget.
01:42 - 01:46Are you fucking kidding me, Crudale?!
01:46 - 01:48Your large head makes me leans toward dwarf.
01:48 - 01:52It's a fucking weight class for small kids, asshole.
01:53 - 01:54No more talking. Now listen up
01:56 - 01:57I bought a white mustang
01:57 - 02:00and drove girls around in high school.
02:00 - 02:03I took them to Applebee's in Garden City
02:04 - 02:08and bought them chicken finger baskets.
02:08 - 02:13Seated right away. Extra honey mustard. All the right moves.
02:14 - 02:16I drop them off at home afterwards
02:17 - 02:21and they drive immediately to Cap's house!!
02:27 - 02:29And he sauteed them.
02:30 - 02:34He even had sex before I did at my own wedding.
02:34 - 02:36I don't understand how he won the league
02:41 - 02:42a second year in a row!!
02:43 - 02:47He drafts a corpse in the fourth round back to back years
02:48 - 02:53then picks up a top 10 running before waivers began,
02:54 - 02:56which is highly illegal.
02:56 - 02:59Karma steps in and Connor dies before the playoffs,
03:00 - 03:02but it doesn't matter.
03:04 - 03:07It's okay, Steph. He'll win one someday....maybe.
03:14 - 03:16Russo, Crudale, Frank:
03:19 - 03:23We can't let this happen again.
03:25 - 03:26Whatever it takes...
03:31 - 03:33Tell him predraft that Iris is pregnant.
03:40 - 03:46Surprise piss test on draft day with new league drug policy
03:46 - 03:49Make him consume carbs during beach season.
03:53 - 03:56Whatever it takes....