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so the shareholders want to see more Fantasy sales

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they tell us "go get these neckbeards buying plastic again"

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we say "sure, let's rethink these prices"

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Fantasy has better rules but 40k is much more affordable

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they say "people clearly want marines and round bases"

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round bases!

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...and marines...

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round bases!

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one of them even said "nobody plays with points anymore"

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no points!

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just throw whatever you have on the table and mash it all into each other

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It's not like wargaming is about army-building or anything

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as long as it fits on your side of the table it all goes

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screw balance!

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it's about fun!

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players asked about tournaments!

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you should have seen those Facebook comments

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I just couldn't care any more!

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I'd told them to go figure it out

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"let me know if you need any help"

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"If you are concerned about rules then you're probably not going to enjoy it"

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they told me

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measuring from the model damages the paint

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the shareholders really loved hearing that

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it reminded them of finecast, people rebuying miscast miniatures

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 and our overpriced refurbishing tools

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so we immediately released this new paint

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extra shiny gold

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3.50 quid for a pot, and you need two of them

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and 17 quid for the can, why not!

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go make the marines extra shiny boys!

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and then to think...

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we told them the End Times was just the beginning!

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we sold them piles of hardcover books

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then made everything obsolete again

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and don't get me started on what we replaced them with

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...staring contests...

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yes! and measuring each other's neckbeards!

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imagine them in their basements sizing up their moustaches

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with blue measuring sticks

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that sure is going to appeal to a younger audience

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...that's what the shareholders wanted right?...

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I have no idea who's supposed to buy this

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we put some interns on the warscrolls

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didn't even tell Forgewold about it

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they're as confused as everyone else

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including the retailers

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and then we wonder why kids prefer video games these days