WEBVTT

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The Greens may win up to five seats

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Possibly holding the balance of power

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Here, here and here

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Then there's the savage insurgent forces of Lt. Lambo

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Beween them they may ruin our chances of controlling Tasmanistan

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Don't worry about it

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Gauleiter Von Erich will fix things as usual

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Mein Failure, Von Erich is no longer in the Senate

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He's a goner

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He's now a local MP for a rural electorate in Tasmanistan

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And Gruppenfuhrein Weiss is no longer Leader

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All who don't support the Lennongrad stadium or gay conversion therapy leave the room now

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I told Rebbeka Weiss to wear a dirdhl when doorknocking

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And now Von Erich has to draw the weekly meat-tray raffle at the RSL

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It's that bastard, Der Spud

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(sniffle)

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(sniffle)

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I even gave der Spud an authentic Austrian chocolate fountain

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He sabotaged my plans for a new Southern Reich

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And stuffed my captive breeding program for a new Master Race

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Der Spud was just avoiding questions from the Commission

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With 50% illiteracy what could go wrong - most of them can't even count to seven!

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Those Schweinhunden at Juice Media had a lot to do with it

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Those subversive scum are always laughing at me

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What are Albo and Toto doing about this?

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He promised me a tree-free Tasmania

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St Bob and his crew are up to their old tricks  again

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Hordes of vegan soccer mums are harassing me constantly

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About some thing they call native forest logging

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We were meant to have an all powerful Lib-Lab Coalition

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That way the Greens will never ever be in power again

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Is that too much to ask? Where where are my elite  Sturm-bogan units?

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They've all been gentrified out of existence

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They've been bribed with artisan beer,  truffle oil pasta and asian dumplings

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With low-salt plant based alternatives

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WTF?

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Where did all this foodie crap come from? What's wrong with sausage sauerkraut and hot rosti?

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Doesn't anyone eat normal food anymore? You can't win a war on this stuff

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And trees!

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There are still far too may trees in Tasmanistan

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I want them all chopped. chipped or burnt

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Don't worry they'll grow back

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All my art projects have been cancelled

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No Dark Mofo surprise gig for me with a dismembered dead cow

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Holy Cow

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All over now

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MONA was going to show my Vienna watercolours and  big-ass building designs

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And I was really looking forward to some toxic salmon patties

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Tasmanistan