Good morning, I have asked Engineering to join us today
to discuss our program
in the Bakken shale play
where we have drilled 393 wells, only 26 have paid out costs...
and where we now have just 16 locations left to drill in our core area.
Yes, well, we need more money...
we can fix this, we just need more money.
Boss...
the bank...
the bank has revoked our revolving line of credit...
we are now kaput.
OK, I want all reservoir engineers who promised me 1.5 million BOE EUR's to leave the room, now.
SHIT ! I NEED MORE MONEY
I HAVE TO HAVE MORE MONEY !
WHERE ARE ALL THE PUD's I WAS PROMISED...THOSE IMBECILE ENGINEERS IN THE HALL HAVE
FAILED, THEY HAVE FAILED US ALL
I WANT THEM ALL SHOT !
SHIT ! $23 OIL PRICES, NO MORE FLARING, 18% INTEREST
...NOT EVEN EOG CAN MAKE A PROFIT WITH THESE PROBLEMS !
I NEED MORE PUD's, MORE RESERVES...MORE MONEY !
Boss, I cannot just make reserves up out of...
YOU DOOMKOPH, WE HAVE BEEN LYING ABOUT RESERVES FOR 10 YEARS...
Sir, the SEC is already on our asses, they will...
SWINE SHIT ! I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE SCHTINKING SEC, THOSE IDIOTS...
AND I AM SICK OF SHAREHOLDERS TOO
THEY WANT FREE CASH FLOW...DIVIDENDS...
NOBODY CAN DRILL THIS SHALE SHIT AND DO THAT ! I AM NOT
A MIRACLE WORKER...WHO ARE THESE IDIOTS ?!!
...AND FIND ME THAT DUMBASS ENGINEER WHO STARTED USING 18% TERMINAL DECLINE RATES
I WANT THAT PERSON SHOT, SHOT I TELL YOU ! SHIT, THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE !
HOW CAN I PAY ALL THE NOTES WITH THESE PROBLEMS ?! WHO
IN THE HELL DO THOSE BANKERS THINK THEY ARE ? SHIT !
We are going to lose our jets...
HOW CAN I FLY TO NAPE EVERY YEAR WITHOUT A JET ? THIS FORSCHTINKIN'
JOB IS WORTH WAY MORE THAN $ 18 MILLION A YEAR !
I hired all you worms from Halcon...
because...YOU SAID THIS TIME YOU COULD GET IT RIGHT, THAT THIS TIME WALL STREET WOULD LOVE US !
YOU DUMB BASTARDS CAN'T FIND OIL ON A GARAGE FLOOR !
We must sell what assets we have left...
we need to do another MLP, a royalty trust...FIND SOMEBODY TO DO A JV WITH
HELL, MAYBE THOSE NINKAPUTS AT OXY WILL BUY US !
See, we can go to work for Vicki Hollub.
Where is my chief financial officer ?
He said he could keep the books cooked, that there would always be money...
...always.
I want that sumbitch shot before nightfall.
This is it boys. Those asshole analysts on CNBC ruined us, our shareholders will
surely fire us all and send us to the Russian front.
It's colder there than North Dakota.