WEBVTT

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So we noticed Ark wasn't making much money anymore

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We need a new strategy we said

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What can we do though? Any ideas?

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Nobody is buying our expansions and all we have is this shitty pirate DLC. Our team lead said "Wait"

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Let's market that DLC as a brand new game

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new game

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new game

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And we'll pay streamers to hype it up for us

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new game

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we'll market the game as 40k concurrent players

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but if 40k people try to join

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the servers overload and won't let them in

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but they keep trying

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for 2 hours they try

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and after that 2 hours

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they can't even refund the game

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new game

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we forgot to take an Ark menu

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out of the reskin

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"40k concurrent players" but we cap zones at 150

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and if anybody complains

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we just say "early access"

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But no, no seriously, 

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it's a great game

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pirates and crocodiles and shit

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40 thousand players on the map

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40 thousand

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40 thousand happy customers

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well they better be happy, they can't refund it now anyways

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new game

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40 th-

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40 thous-

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40 thousand concurrent players

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our current servers can't even support 40

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and they're all buying it anyways because we paid the streamers off

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Host: "In G-Fuel?"

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In G-fuel yes of course

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they can't get enough of that shit

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strawberry is their favorite

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so that is how you make a million dollars off a reskin

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Host: "Will it ever be good?"

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Honestly we don't care, it's our 3rd early access game

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we make our money either way, doesn't matter if it's good

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who finishes games these days

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just sell reskins

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they don't even have to work

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just make sure you have a lot of G-Fuel to give away