| 00:00 - 00:03 | 991.2 models have reached full production. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | 0-60 down by .1 second, fuel economy up 3%. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Lap times around the Berlin track are down by 2 seconds. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | The new RWS reduces turn radius... |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | and smaller steering wheel feels great. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | And the reviews? |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | What are the magazines saying? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Mein Führer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | They... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | They say it's not as engaging or emotional as the outgoing 3.8L motor. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | But they love the Apple Car Play! |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Everyone who hasn't driven the old car get out! |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | Why would anyone buy a Porsche that's less engaging and emotional? |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | That's the entire point of the car! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Do you realize the 911 is responsible for 20% of VAG profits? |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | You'll silence any reviewer that has anything bad to say about it! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | If they even so much as mention "turbo lag" they'll never... |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | drive a Porsche press car again! Why didn't you fuck up the Beetle instead? |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Or the Tiguan! Does anyone even know what that is? |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | You idiots promised me the turbo would be better! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | It does have 5% more horsepower! |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | It's 100lbs heavier with turbo lag! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | The 3.0L engine will be better in China. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | The Chinese aren't buying luxury cars anymore idiot! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | America is our most important market! |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | They like big, loud engines! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Not quiet little Prius motors... |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | That turn off when you're at a stoplight! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | You haven't screwed us this bad since... |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | you let the EPA find out we were cheating on emission tests. |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | The 911 is supposed to fun to drive! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | Not some whirring unreliable POS like the GT-R. |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Can we put the 3.8L back in the next GTS? |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | An option for people that like a big engine? |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | That makes you feel like a man when you drive it? |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | How will you idiots fix this? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | What will make people for get about this disaster? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | And let us keep our fucking jobs? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | I like having my own office here! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | And driving a Porsche company car! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I already spent my fucking bonus on a new house! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | Don't cry... we still have the Panamera. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | We'll make a limited edition car, |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | something nobody will get to buy... |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | with a big screaming 4.0L engine! |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Even put a manual transmission in it. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | People will want it so much... |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | they'll forget about the piece of crap 3.0L... |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | and drool over it's red stickers. |
