| 00:00 - 00:03 | We have got you two tickets to watch Northants at Wantage RD |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | You will be seated in the blue seats |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Play starts at 11 O'clock Heir Hitler |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | Who are Northants playing in the game? |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | Its an LVC 4 day match mien Fuhrer |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | Leicstershire sir |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | That shitbox Midlands outfit? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Ya mien Fuhrer |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | But there's a problem |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | That spinner has been picked for Northants |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | Spriegel is playing |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Fucking Spriegel |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | How can the only German sounding spinner be so shit! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | How can I relax with hisn bowling flying around the ground! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | Then that idiot Ricardo waving his flag around like a dick |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | And fucking Wendell starts yapping away over by the old scoreboard!! |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | When will I get any peace at the game?? |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | David Smith stole his flag to shut him up but no luck |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | Why do Northants have so many loonies!! |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | Then Mad Paul shows up on his fucking bike whistling away like a cunt!! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | No one has a fucking mustache any more but me |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | The guy is as mental as Gerbels |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Ranting and raving at the Derngate Theatre |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | Then Alan Hodgson shows up |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Known for his drinking all around the county circuit |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | The guy is a drunk! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | Kronenburg,Stella,Newcastle Brown Ale... |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | You name it he drinks it |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | Who will forget the Southend Q/F Sky match |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | For fucks sake |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | And why his David Smith so camp? |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | He sounds like Alan Carr, Chatty fucking man |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Poncing around banning booze from the ground |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | Its county cricket. That's what drinking is for! |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Loads of old farts on blue chip pensions getting slowly pissed |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | I suppose Bampkin is at the ground to? |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | Moaning about some shit yes again |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | At the Who concert in 1968 my ass! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | At least he didn't pretend to be at Pils wedding |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | Will Kelly will no doubt be there in his brown chords being too bloody nice again |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | And that Viewfromtheblues gobshite talking crap all day |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | What do the Rushden boys see in that dick |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | Has that guy ever worked?? |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | Why couldn't I have gone to the Oval? |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Even their tea is cheaper |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | Pensioners don't get frisked for booze there. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | And the scoreboerd still works in May |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | Wakely, a test class batsmen? |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | .More edges than Hampton Court. |
