| 00:00 - 00:03 | I am sorry to report the Domino's Pizza van is stuck on the ringroad. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | It is currently near Junction 19. |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | Waiting at the traffic lights outside B & Q.. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | They have promised a free tub of garlic sauce.. |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | If they don't reach here by 8 o clock. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | I also want a free garlic bread, |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | The round one with the green speckly bits. |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | Errrrrr, boss... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | Steiner's.... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | Only Steiner's kebab shop do those.. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | And they won't serve us any more... |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | I am not eating yoghurt, or crisps, for my frigging supper... |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | WE ONLY GOT BARRED OUT OF THERE |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | COS YOU THREE GOT RATARSED! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | ORDERED THREE KEBABS WITH EXTRA CHILLI SAUCE THEN DID A RUNNER WITHOUT PAYING! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | SHOWING OFF COS YOU HAD THAT SLAPPER WITH YOU.. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | I DIDN'T EVEN WANT A PIZZA! |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | FUCKIN' FANCY CHEESE ON TOAST, THATS ALL THAT IS! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | I WANT A DONNER KEBAB WITH CHILLI & GARLIC.. |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | AND EXTRA BITS OF THAT RED CABBAGE AND I WANT IT NOW!!! |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | Sir, we've threatened to send all the staff to a concentration camp but they won't deliver until those kebabs are paid for... |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | SHUT IT, GOBSHITE! I'M HANK MARVIN AND YOU BASTARDS ARE USELESS! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | Boss, will I pushbike down the chippy for you? |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | FISH & CHIPS! DO I LOOK LIKE I WANT FISH & FUCKING CHIPS! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | ENGLISH SHITE..... |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | I WANT A KEE-FUCKIN' BAB! |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | OH, IT WAS FINE WHEN I TOOK YOU ALL DOWN THE BANANA LEAF FOR THE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT BUFFET! |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | THAT FAT BASTARD GOERING SCOFFING ALL THE SPARE RIBS! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | AND YOU DIDN'T SAVE ANY OF THE FUCKIN CRISPY SEAWEED FOR ME! |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | EVEN THOUGH I WAS PAYING FOR THE FUCKIN' LOT OF YER! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | IS IT SO HARD FOR A FUHRER JUST TO GET A KEBAB ON A SATURDAY NIGHT?! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | WELL BUGGER THE LOT OF YER, I'LL GO GET A BARGAIN BUCKET FROM KFC AND I'M NOT FUCKIN SHARING! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | See how radgy I get? |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | When I don't get my supper? All I want is a donner kebab, and LOADS of garlic.. |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | But no.... YOU LOT COULDN'T INVADE RUSSIA, LET ALONE GET ME SOME BASTARD SUPPER! |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | You really are totally fucking useless. |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | YOU'RE A PACK OF USELESS PRICKS.. |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | AND DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW YOU'VE ALL BEEN SHAGGING THAT NEW SECRETARY OF MINE! |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | I WAS GONNA BASH HER BACK DOORS IN! |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I'LL HAVE TO FIRE HER NOW.. |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | I'M NOT GOING SLOPPY SECONDS AFTER YOU LOT! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | You got off lucky, love. His kebab's a better shag than him. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | I think there's a bit of cheese in the fridge. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | You'll have to scrape the mould off before you put it in a sarny.. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Who's making it? |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | A manky cheese sarny... |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | See if you can find a bit of Branston pickle.. |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | And I'll have that hard-boiled egg.. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | Happy fuckin' days.... |
