00:00 - 00:03 | SInce the start of Geeks Who Drink Trivia at the Penny Tap House, |
00:03 - 00:06 | Team Affirmative Action (Like Us On Facebook) |
00:06 - 00:08 | Has won 50% of all the games played since May. |
00:08 - 00:12 | But recently, only 2 wins in 6 weeks. Third Place in the Fall Tournament |
00:12 - 00:16 | Behind "We Can't Hear Back Here." And behind "Rural Jurors." |
00:16 - 00:20 | Team Affirmative Action is legit. I still like their chances. |
00:20 - 00:24 | They dominate because of their diversity. |
00:24 - 00:26 | But Sir, |
00:27 - 00:29 | The Quizmaster... |
00:31 - 00:34 | The Quizmaster posted last week's scores. |
00:35 - 00:39 | Team Affirmative Action finished 9th last week. |
00:53 - 00:58 | Anyone who isn't down with T.A.A. |
00:58 - 01:01 | Be gone. |
01:13 - 01:15 | How the hell did they get 9th place??? |
01:15 - 01:17 | They've never finished in 9th place!!! |
01:18 - 01:23 | Losing to the goddamn "Rural Jurors" team?? |
01:24 - 01:28 | And those fools "We Can't Hear Back Here?" |
01:29 - 01:31 | The PA is cranked to Eleven!!! |
01:31 - 01:34 | I told Affirmative Action! I told them, |
01:34 - 01:37 | Quit Changing Answers during the True False rounds!! |
01:37 - 01:40 | And their pop music game is weak!! |
01:40 - 01:42 | But they Joker the listening round every time- |
01:42 - 01:46 | They know good music. They need to learn the shitty stuff!! |
01:46 - 01:48 | My Furher, their team is missing members every week- |
01:49 - 01:52 | Don't give me that "Out of Town for Work" Crap!! |
01:53 - 01:54 | I don't want to hear it. |
01:56 - 01:57 | "Domination through Diversity." ?!?! |
01:57 - 02:00 | There's no diversity, when the black guy doesnt show up!! |
02:00 - 02:03 | And where's the white girl, half the time!? |
02:04 - 02:09 | The 2 guys with the beards, and the pencil sharpener guy, |
02:09 - 02:13 | can't keep doing all the heavy lifting! |
02:14 - 02:17 | And the heavy blonde dude who knows sports, where is he?? |
02:18 - 02:21 | They haven't won a general knowledge round since the death of Stalin!! |
02:27 - 02:30 | How come they never text me? I want to play for them so bad. |
02:30 - 02:34 | I have a memory, a brilliant mind for trivia, |
02:34 - 02:38 | ...like a Thousand Elephant Robots! |
02:41 - 02:42 | They have my cell number. |
02:43 - 02:47 | My knowledge of U.S. State Capitols can destroy the lesser teams! |
02:48 - 02:53 | "Fries Before Guys" drinks enough alcohol to float a battleship!! |
02:53 - 02:56 | What kind of team name is "Rural Jurors?" |
02:56 - 02:59 | And "We Can't Hear Back Here?" ...yeah right. |
03:00 - 03:03 | Well, I can't hear, over your Siri and Google searches!!! |
03:04 - 03:10 | Be calm. They can't prove we use our phones. |
03:14 - 03:16 | Maybe they will let me play with them, |
03:19 - 03:24 | if I impress Team Affirmative Action with my evil plot. |
03:26 - 03:30 | The Quizmaster's Cat. |
03:31 - 03:33 | I'll do it alone. |
03:40 - 03:46 | Write a demand letter. Cut words out of magazines and draw scary pictures. |
03:46 - 03:52 | "Your Cat is at the end of a Kalishnikov." |
03:53 - 03:59 | What a dumpster fire. |