| 00:00 - 00:03 | Then Cicero moves on to Pompey's overall excellence. |
| 00:04 - 00:05 | He explains how he has diminished war |
| 00:05 - 00:07 | All across the Mediterranean. |
| 00:08 - 00:12 | He outlines and even exaggerates the man's qualities |
| 00:12 - 00:15 | beyond the common virtues such as 'speed in finishing. |
| 00:17 - 00:19 | And after that section |
| 00:19 - 00:21 | he just talk about authority and luck? |
| 00:24 - 00:26 | My Führer... |
| 00:27 - 00:28 | That section... |
| 00:31 - 00:33 | That section is only up to page five of the set text. |
| 00:34 - 00:36 | We have to learn 24 pages in total. |
| 00:53 - 00:58 | Those who see Cicero as the father of rhetoric, leave the room. |
| 01:13 - 01:15 | That cocky little twat! |
| 01:15 - 01:17 | We're meant to study this fucking twat! |
| 01:18 - 01:23 | And to think, he began with 'I have given enough words'! |
| 01:25 - 01:28 | I've revised for three days. |
| 01:29 - 01:31 | And he's going to ramble for 19 more pages |
| 01:31 - 01:34 | about this boring-arse motherfucker! |
| 01:34 - 01:37 | How the fuck did he expect the crowd to stay there listening |
| 01:37 - 01:40 | to the most boring speech in the fucking galaxy? |
| 01:40 - 01:42 | My Führer, Ms Bevan says they were entranced by Cicero's skilful- |
| 01:42 - 01:46 | Fuck Ms Bevan, and her shitty little tests! |
| 01:46 - 01:48 | My Führer, he positions his words like an artist. |
| 01:48 - 01:52 | He positions his words like a toddler on ecstasy! |
| 01:53 - 01:54 | Where is the verb? |
| 01:56 - 01:57 | The audience must have been growing beards |
| 01:57 - 02:00 | trying to figure out what he was saying |
| 02:00 - 02:03 | because the verb is eight lines out of place! |
| 02:04 - 02:08 | And once they do, all they get is lists of wars |
| 02:08 - 02:13 | and bitchy insults from this malicious little fucktard! |
| 02:14 - 02:16 | And we have to memorise this shit! |
| 02:17 - 02:21 | I'd rather walk into the lunch hall in full drag and be fucked by Stalin! |
| 02:27 - 02:29 | Don't you wonder if Cicero did all this |
| 02:30 - 02:34 | As an evil joke? A way to crush our souls |
| 02:34 - 02:36 | Two thousand years in the future? |
| 02:41 - 02:42 | Do you think he ever realised |
| 02:43 - 02:47 | the utter fucking irony when he says he'll keep it brief? |
| 02:48 - 02:53 | Or the price we'd have to pay to pass an A Level in Latin? |
| 02:54 - 02:56 | And along with the sheer arrogance of Terry Bird; |
| 02:56 - 02:59 | I'm fucking sick of seeing the name "Terry Bird"! |
| 03:00 - 03:02 | All he did was type up some vocab! |
| 03:04 - 03:07 | It's true - he over-credits himself. |
| 03:14 - 03:16 | We have to study this for the whole year. |
| 03:19 - 03:23 | And I'm sure deep down, none of you ever liked Cicero. |
| 03:25 - 03:26 | Did you? |
| 03:31 - 03:33 | It's Greek that you liked. |
| 03:40 - 03:46 | You get to learn about two men fighting over a male prostitute |
| 03:46 - 03:49 | while I'm stuck here learning fucking Cicero. |
| 03:53 - 03:56 | I'm so fucking done. |
